Thursday, December 31, 2015

when I think about tomorrow

It is usually that I have a whole lot going on and rarely think about the very end what they will do with my meat suit. Like the whole thing is weird to me and I never think about that is never that I  should get my proper golden casket and where I will stay for the night before they dispose of my carcass.
I do not have grandiose ideas  of where I am buried.

I only talk about it because my dad, who is older in years, not that old, trust me, he is spry, my dad is consumed about the details of funeral life.
He sings at every funeral from his church so what do you want me to do?

"of course, dad, we will have your body in church for over night.:)"
"of course dad. It will be nice. Sorry no marching bad though, there will be plenty of"
Sometimes he will say that he has something to say and we all get scared..hah hahaaa We do not want to hear it because he has a good life. he forgets he has people who love him and don't want him to change.. I am saying that for many it is never enough, is it?
Old people are interesting like that. They grieve over why their kids did not follow in their path and change for them but they are too arrogant to realize they are also not willing to change for their kids..somebody is gonna be sad when they want so much from everyone while they sit on their throne of power.
Do I have daddy issues?
You bet you ass I do! I will not challenge them because I do what I want and my dad comes from a different time where Franko (that fuk)and Mussolini( dumb fuk) were prominent and people marched in line....I  have educated my self enough to where he (my dad) will not get in to a debate with me..hahaha.
I do not debate him. I always point things out... thangs that make him think.

my dad
"what do you think about Obama bowing in the mosque when he went to visit the mosque?"
"I think he did the right thing, god is everywhere and it is respectful."
He said nothing more..
A few years back...some beauty queen said some dumb thing and since they watch that tv, they were both, my mom and dad, all like "ana, what do you think about what that girl said that gays shouldn't marry?"
"what do I care about some dumb girl in a bathing suit and gown, what do I even care what she thinks?"
Next day, the beauty queen's porn pictures came
I said nothing..

Oye. I wonder if my kids think of me like this?
They are older now and I feel way better than me because they have me for a mom. My mom? Awesome mom!
I come from a long line of no bullshit wise women who can kill a snake to protect her kids. Sadly even we the strong ones, get stepped on by men and their violent ways.
My kids,
they kind of protect me now. The big boys will come over and fix things..
Thangggss, babies, thangs!

Last day of the year means nothing to a cell in our liver so don't drink too much, Morning comes fast!
Tomorrow is next year already?

Aγιoς Βασίλης έρχεται
και δεν μας καταδέχεται
από - από την Καισαρεία
είσαι αρχό - είσαι αρχόντισσα, κυρία.

we close our eyes
we rest
we just stop to grieve and dispair
no need for that
today we smile
we love and admire                                                                                                        
our family
our family our friends
the ones that enrich us
that make us laugh
that take away worry with a song
that bring us cookies and some soap
a nice cup of tea
a flurry of decadence
no regrets
you did it
put it down if it sucks
you must be your own person
no ties or chains of neglect and pain

your joy comes from you
being alert
energy radiating through your whole sphere of contentedness
us, at pure harmony with each moment
each choice

Thank  you and good morning!

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