Sunday, December 31, 2017

bye then 2017 Hello Saturn strength, saturn reality, saturn humble bastards hello 2018

So you gave up being a renunciate and now you're eating meat again, wow, don't you know meat and animal flesh is the root of all evil?"
"I thought money is the root of all evil?"
"that too, to be truly happy, you have to be pure of heart and work really hard."
Sounds like a dirty lie we tell ourselves I thought to myself.

"I love money, money loves me!"

Renunciate not, my friends!

Mediate, yes!
close your eyes and look in to the void..the dark matter which carries you
if you do that for ten minutes your brain begins to spark and it is wonderful..

I tried it you know,  the renunciate devote life, I need devotion because I was raised to be devout and to not please the devil.
I hated it when my mom would say it.
"let us go to church in order to not please the devil." you stand a little bit prouder when you don't please that guy for sure.

Fuking cave men we are, really!

I wonder why if money is the root of all evil, why the churches are built like castles. and how to be a part you pay every sunday as the pass a tray to keep up the castle and then they go and pray and sing in  some is nice man..nice people go there because they want to cherish a happy moment and ask god to shine on them. He should anyhow if he is him. So many in some of the castles too. Do they really know each other because they would be better drivers if they did.
He should shine on all self aware creatures and stop with the hell business. He should rain the gold (money)as he does to keep us alive.  He does not need a  monk or a a deacon or a saint. Either he is real or he ain't, all I know is that , this needs to be said...

All the sunshine on every head, that is my way!

Don't worry, I won't make this a rant about religion :)

The next thing is that this whole winter of 20187000, is about having fixed or fixing.
Remember when I said about a path full of broken leads?

Tt is time to smooth out your path just like the rings of saturn. Some are really small smooth particles and some of the rings are boulders as big as cities..Saturn is so big that its gravity does so effect us and where it located does effect us. Our water, our cold cold temps..the winter blues, when we can ponder on the saddest things and it works us up.
say sorry
say sorry
say sorry all day and know this it is a perfect way to open the dialog..towards non conflict. This means real communication on expectations and a sort of new dictatorship in areas of work and big retail business.
When everything is clear to us we do not have to remember what we said. I like transparency like this.and it can it get to be a little toxic?
Remember what happened when Uranus was in Aries last time? Hitler, that is what!
The good thing here is that Saturn is in Capricorn and will hold a little more control. You will see the division in more and more outlets where we are almost herded like cattle, first going for the food and then being trapped while eating it!

Focus on what is real and don't be a cunt for sure because even if the strong survive, you and me, we must be held accountable ..I will definitely focus on my business of what I make buy my hands and who I am.

Saturn in Capricorn is is a change in many attitudes, you see it all over the place.
You have a big divide because Uranus in Aries is at an angle which will charge us big time in how we make money.
I know it is true because there is always enough for me and you always.

Look at Iran at this very moment because the students are done with the dictatorship.
Can you imagine being in such violence to fight for what is true and not what ancient texts dictate?
I can in a way.. being in a cult for so long.
Saturn is my focus now for a while and while the archetype is seriously strong in our human experience..saturn is aging, being more alone, kids growing up and leaving and being a third stage of your human alive awareness.
Then you will become dust again and in millions of years that dust which feeds a plant, grass, birds or the sun goes red giant and eats us up  to be squeezed in to a diamond hot ball..

we become something else at the same time never being

Wednesday, December 27, 2017

Just before the year ends we give a thank you and put out hormones which attract a mate to keep us warm in winter when the snows are deep

Measuring your goodness at the end of the day is an interesting  side theme in our lives.
How many people treasure you is a nice thing to live by if they do indeed treasure you.
Maybe they tolerate you , that would suck!

Christmas is come and gone friends. It is time to really rejoice at the new year ahead (the boons, new customers, all the still here  loyal customers, lovely ladies and men who love my work, my mom, tonie, the boys too, my girls, , my sarah, my emmi and my emily rose my vallie too))and for me, that is what I have leaned to understand fully and gratefully. To always bring the good in and not push away the goodness..
It is big..

I am taking a week off from soap making. After that I will make some nice things.
I want to make a blood orange soap with black pepper and then I will put bergamot and a drop or two palmarosa..not too much. I want it to be smooth and hard  like a good man.

I have a stunningly beautiful grapefruit too. This will become jasmine infused for a future creamy, super charged,  soap..
Jasmine is about sex and the chakra that attracts the wonderment of ones juices and how the connect to others.yes indeed.
Some people find Jasmin horrid and sickening. yes, sex can be dirty..

Open your heart and ponder on your fertile garden. Somewhere which needs nurture and clean water. Drink some..the light shines now on areas unknown to you..ohh...
Creativity stirring you to move and say things shame prevents you from saying
doing things which will enhance the future you tomorrow and the next year
not deplete because of anxiety and worry
not destroy because of hastily spoken words
suck it all in and change it before you spew out more broken footpaths for yourself
and then you might.. you cry that you are alone and no one loves you alone, own it because it is here and now..

We have Netflix, I mean we are never alone alone..

Jasmine attracts things, money, wealth and mental pictures of comfort, clean life where happiness is easy, movement is rich and light carrying us to new heights and down lows of others' reflections of themselves..
I told you it is big

Jasmine which attracts
Grapefruit to sparkle
sandalwood to mellow
patchouli to hold

Sunday, December 24, 2017

for some saturn is a ray of sunshine

Can you tell me that in the last year you have not totally changed your mind about what need to change?
Can you tell me that you did not walk away from something you were dragging along for years now? Yes you did!
Dragging it around as if you are somehow in charge of protecting someone from the realities ahead?
Doing this can get you killed like Carl in the walking dead.
There are times to focus on the task and not deviate for sure yea?
Like if Carl had stayed home to protect Alexandria instead of looking for strangers in the woods where is danger.
My gut was wrenched from the first moment he decided to help people and be "good" now.
All his life he wasn't as compassionate, then, something hard ass struck him and he realized what was important. His own death!
more saturn for you there....
I do not know if you watch walking dead. I love the show because even though it is pretend things, Kirkman can really tell a good story  on some real human reactions to stress and all the toxic things that bring us pain and suffering.
Those are the zombies see?
Your toxic reactions to stress..
mental pain
bone aches
muscle aches
teeth need fixed
feet are stiff
now it is time
to take a seat
curl the toes one by one
focus on the baby toe and then release now go all the way with each muscle like next the ankles
read in to that spot and see if it is hot
go up to the knees
think about the hips
how easily they carry you

remember cruelty is easy
and color it what you like
mean is mean
even when you are nice

now breathe in the good though the left side where you get to sift through what is kept and get rid of the waste by the right

What is it you want?

magnetic thoughts here and there
sometimes you kind of stare at the options
sometimes you grab the one that looks easy and then it drags you down for nothing..
sometimes it is people
sometimes it is you honey pulling them
you do not have to

there we are then,  us together making wars and boundaries and blowing up bombs in the sea..which gave us life on this little blue spec and yet  and we messily fret..

(I will stop)

Saturday, December 23, 2017

lessons and more endurance saturn (the past) capricorn (your worth)

My wrath can be is true.
Not only do I come from a heavy boxing and martial arts background if you will, I am like a sword with words. I can see cruelty from a mile because I lived it. Beyond what you could imagine. Unless you have seen "midnight" a story doctor who series..that would describe my life with that know what is funny?
My mom, she told me, she tried to change my mind and I would not listen,  so loved up I was.
hahahhaaa she was like, "tashi, no, he is a bad  bad boy for you, stay home, be safe"
You can't stay home and not is boring, at least I thought so. Now you can't get me to leave my home!
And I got to live beyond what is normal, in the jungle in the mountains always in nature and living a dream soap making life..ah..when people say it could have been so good", mmm so so  good..right? I got to make my own coconut oil from coconuts I collected and ylang ylang I grew and it was great, except.. for... the underlying insidious thoughts that molded us slowly, and with malicious intent.
I almost did not make it out. My kids too. maybe we are still effected. It is what it is. I know that I am somber and must review my thoughts.

"but they are sapphire waterfalls!"
Those were my thoughts then. "everyone should have a chance to change and learn and be good."
They should babes, but belief systems get in the way and they hate instead..until some one good is dead and there is nothing more you can do to them to feel good about yourself under god.

Saturn in Capricorn

I will stay quiet and give people a chance to get it together. I have my limits.
"but you are so sweet!"
They say that about me.
I am not sweet by any means honies. I am fierce and I will not have bad memories spoil  my life or allow myself to be indignant or too proud to just "forgive!"
What ever you are mad about, let it go..seriously, life is too short. That is why there is a saying about it. Keep you boundaries too, I mean of course!

I know I babble on and on.. I know that sometimes you might not even care about what I say here. I know that and I hope I have made you cry maybe one time and laugh many times.
Cry and remember what you came here for and what you brought. Have you lost some things along the way?
Was all this pride you are so fond of worth it? Are you happier now or ever?
Last year, were you happy? Are you doing what you love and love it while you do it? Is you life marred with mean people who could never understand what it is like to be a hostage of ideas to the point of fear and loathing?
Do you stretch or mediate? Do you at least cut your toe nails?

Wednesday, December 20, 2017

Saturn in Capricorn

Things get real huh?

They do and they are.

Saturn says, "what have you come with?"
"how have you worked?
What words ground themselves through your teeth?

Look the planets do not have a guy ruling them and there is no entity that has control over us beyond our brains creations and thoughts and memories..
lingering on hurt feelings is Saturn and paying the price for each thought.

There is success and growing beyond what we thought.
And the gravity of our situation becomes real and focused. death too is a part..
know this

we are energy
never to go away and yet to break apart and connect to something else again and again and all in darkness of space we pull in to ourselves and create light.
It is big yo..
we are so too energy
we are also memories
memories we have left behind after we are gone..they can linger for years and cast a wide shadow until they  get pulled once again in to the darkness and become transformed in to....


have a great day babies

more to come from the brain or a crazy greek lady

e l e n e e t h a

Wednesday, December 13, 2017

sun saturn mercury R venus all in saggitarius

Yup..I still love astrology and I love science, what?

Feel a little bit shaken lately?
Do you feel like some people said more than they should have to you?
Are you feeling like you are being singled out as a villain and in reality you don't give a fuck but something has stirred inside you that has left you with too much awareness as to  how things are?
For me it is all 12th house.. observing others growth and mine too..
For Capricorn too..a ton of secret longings and realities coming up, making your head hurt during the day, perhaps in your sleep your body reacts by aware of a new deep line on your left side..the one you must always be aware of who you let in and what thoughts are developing to be driven out....

saturn is always 

You have all these other planets kind of clustering around  each other and mercury retrograde brings  things out man! Look at the now the chefs in the fine restaurant business! Poor April Bloomfield, she kept her mouth shut and made a good living and now the actual pig has been spotted! I understand and feel regrets for her.
We are all sexist pigs. One of my managers grabbed my ass all the time. I was a body builder, it was a fine fine ass..I did not care at the time. I never slept with any of them. Yuk! This is why you do not go to the hotel  room at all! Go home,  watch a nice thing and eat some real learn to perform, Osoto Garri!
There are morality clauses being created now that are a needed protocol. We must be respectful to each other, that is an idea which progress and education brings. Men do rule the business and health world and now women who are smart are in and saying, 

"no, I do not want to hug you!"

What kind of freaks me out is how quickly people are willing to axe anyone they can..OMG so mean on the internet, right?
The hate leagues is what I am pondering on. There are many ready and willing to feel better and sweeter, and richer and what ever political things they are groping for..yes groping..National Health Care my ass, make it really free or go home! (seriously, that insurance carrot dangling is old and outdated)Pay doctors loads of money, pay teachers loads of money to make smart people all over earth..YEA!!! 

That Libra moon has brought a bit of justice, and yet still , we must see the  things as requiring review and change.
You must change
You are not safe
keep your eyes open for sly mean vindictive simple uneducated types that may have power in the day time only..

You are your own power and must never back off or spew out meaningless words, you must speak quietly, and with force of wisdom.

Think and be kind.

Do not join in on hate groups about Tump or any other dude in power. they are not your friends and the person who hates them as you might, is not your aware of too much focus on others and take all that energy to make something amazing happen for yourself, your home and your kin..something which helps us all and gets rid of fat fuks who have no respect for anyone with a vigina..


Monday, December 11, 2017

in mercury we trust mercury retro news and views

Remember the heiress lady I served for a week in costa rica  that was a coke head  who came to the hotel with her costa rican boy?

 I did today because we were talking about our dishes and why people loved my food so much then. That boy she was with gave me looks like she is a jerk and we all knew..he was there for money, which she may not have given to him because she had the big talk. I wonder if he killed her?
Ah the resort hotel business!
My only bad review was from her. she said the food was padestrian at best..ha ha ha
see what had happened was, :), I cooked all day to present dinner at the hotel, at six..We had fresh everything because we grew the food right there. There  was an intern there who came to study gardening in the jungle and I got to cook her goods. It was one of my best memories..The plates I produced were delicious, fresh and unique..I had to make many things from scratch, breads, rolls, salads that blew your mind, even before the cocaine..ha hahaaaa
anyhow, at 4 pm all high on cocaine because she carried around a device that she inhaled right out of..yup..she saw me making stuff and wanted to eat and knew she could not and wanted a "plate" saved for 4 am when she eats..she took a plate and it sat there untouched for 12 hours in the jungle..
That was so crazy!
One gal took ecstasy and was so sweet all that night and in the morning when she was paying to leave, she was a jerk..ah, fun right?
The cook, she leaves all that behind and goes home. I loved being a cook there. I made some fine ass dishes, "yo, Thomas Keller!"

I walked to work and to  home all the time.

 Funny, it was in the middle of nowhere and I could walk home because such peaceful natives of the land live there. We became close. We all knew each other.
I love the feeling that no one is going to take my warm bed anytime soon or that I will not have water. Or, kill me walking home.
I am not the adventurous type, all the things I have done in the act of surviving my lot, my creation my attachments and my mistakes that led to my final artistic expressions right now, must be reviewed.

I am emotional to the extreme having lived in violence from men my whole life. having fought back against their strength..I could kick better then I of my things I love so much in all of this, is, that my ideas never stop, do they. I love my growth in aromatherapy, I love it, I love oils so much!

When I tell you about all of my life's adventures, aromatherapy, oils, flavors, balance, taste, classic, review, strain, cool, do not speak, say you are sorry. Is it money you want more of?

"I am sorry". it always works, always..

"just because you are right, you don't have a divine right to be mean!"


Mercury retrograde and how our mind remembers words said to us, horrid words running out of our mouths like water..words..I love them!

Water flows, forgives, fears, deeply fathoms easily, assuring,  and is all of life. Drink water!

Nothing is exactly as you think it was anyway, is it? There must be the goodness that developes and the trust and acceptance of one's self must must must come with back up, doings daily and thoughtfulness, right?

Wednesday, December 6, 2017

That Mercurial Feeling

Mercury Retrograde feeling..
That feeling of discontent and always trying to justify yourself.
Prove that you are worthy of  some unknown driving force.
You know it and it is not really unknown either.
It is your subconscious mind trying to avoid the truth while blaming some other thing that has nothing to do with your guilt, anger, hate and punitive reactions??
Not you, you...but you do know of what I am speaking right?

Mercury kind of makes me grind my teeth a little and I have to be conscious of that because maybe we all hold too much in with all this quiet.
Maybe it is time to say what is on our mind and say it nice not some mad crap and snide remarks..say it gentle and why you want it. Say it real because it has to be a way that is beyond your control beyond what you can understand.

Mercury retrograde  is about fine lines and walking a tight rope. It is imaginary, yo!
You do not have to walk any rope, maybe before you quit half though, walk backwards not forward?
Your call, I say go back and fix yourself not go back and accept every lie  so that you are a whipping boy, someone to despise
locked up in a gilded cage
all tied up so the world can't see,
can't see
your beauty and strength and courage and sexuality with is hot like fire and mellow like wine from an enchanted  vineyard..there is a song about it (sting, if you love somebody)

Ah love..
ah relationaships
ah family
ah, traffic and jerks on the road.

Be chill and be careful.. I broke like three things already!

Monday, December 4, 2017

I am making more balms now and here we are Mercury Retrograde

Re think
Re Do
Accidents on a minor level..broken glass, broken plans..chill out and take a bath!
Everything is better when you are clean and cozy!
Balm slowly warming on your clean damp skin and mixing with your personal musk..mmmm

Balm Gele' Skin Food....

You think it is just about melting some wax, adding oil and there you are, done. It is not that easy and sometimes the essential oils require a little more care. You cannot just add them too soon because they will evaporate fast. I have done a good job here.
silver fir gele'

I am very excited because I bought some lemon 5x!
I know it is not organic lemon but it is so strong and so lemony and so refreshing I had to buy 16 ounces.
There is a special set you can but from the menu on etsy and the cream is fantastic with lemon and a little vanilla and deliciously prepared shea butter.

shea butter (3cayg)
avocado oil
marula oil
lemon 5x
vanilla infusion in coconut oil
5x lemon set

I bought enough rose hydrosol to make the spray toner with it and I am very happy.

I am fixing to make some new sprays too!
Good times.
Re Think
Re Do

Wednesday, November 29, 2017

things birth of old whore

I was going to call this soap some dulled up version, like bitch or OW, even!
My friend said to call her what she is..the old whore because to say the things that make us who we are.
I have never been the old whore more than now.

Here it is. It was about a man. I was crazy for him, he was so smart. I was smitten by his thoughts his knowledge and discipline and I was enamored of his martial arts. He made me a good fighter. I was rockin out kicks like a pro!
All the things I loved so much then..I was also fit and young and striking, not american beauty but more Greek..yes, Iam greek so that can not be changed.
We made art and he did all the math with soap(it was before technology with fats on the internet) and it was good..I became anastasia's ideas and it was so good. living the life you believe in is very good.
I opened the door at night, his night, his dark night he hated in the day world was darker yet than any other thing he could have created for himself and so imaginative too!
I was as if the goddess Psyche who saw her lover at night and he was a demon after all. He had been  hiding his true self from her eyes..
It all comes out..and brews and stews for many until it trickles out in small clues  one by one like the hollywood people right now..
I cried a lot when I found out. I screamed at god and all the promises made on his behalf. 
How be so in hate and still meditate and make some Catholic priests, yea?
How can you hide for years and pretend you are worthy when at night when no one can see, you are willing and happy to torture and humiliate women..sadistically? How can you prowl through the internet for just that perfect fantasy girl or boy..who knows what you really like, it doesn't matter really??

Here are some things we allow from men..or our current lovers..I do not care how you have sex..just read more books..listen and don't lie about who you are. You do not have to confess anything!

we allow belonging to them
we allow loyalty no matter what
we allow abuse in the area of unbalanced chores
we allow the pretending during the day to continue in hopes that things will willingly improve because desire for the best things..
we are comfy with the money and do not want to separate the home and suffer out in the world 
we pretend that it is just a joke when they make up a fantasy about you in order to cloak their own debauchery
It is not a is called "gaslighting" in order to divert their own deportment in their lives.

I had asked a question see/ I had dared to present the conditions in the day time.

"How can you behave this way, really?"

"I can never fully be loyal to an old whore like you."

"oh, really??"

Yea..I learned hard that stuck like a knife..I had to rethink my loyalties and I had buried myself in details that took time to separate and come to terms..I stayed cold from then, though.  
I reminded myself and I stayed fixed on my goals that I must not remain in this horrid state of mind.
Horrid because to come to your fullest contentment, you must not need to bend the knee..
I knew I hated this pretend life of me bad, he, big bad!! Lovers or partners like that will think bad about anyone who gets too close. Why? Abusive assholes, that is why!

Fear and shame is a player in our lives, I am afraid. Shed that right now!

Here we are.. The Old Whore.. 

She is just so fine. Chypre' Smoky, resinous, lingering, smart..patchouli, labdanum, oak moss..yum

Old Whore 18 

Don't be sad is just a story..I love you!

Hello December

It is almost December and a new year approaches.
This year as every year has been busy and tumultuous.

I got turned down for a job which was a secret blessing even tho they piss me off with their fake bull shit words..
Retail is like a thing, like on (spoilers)) stranger things..a strange swarm like reality which is unseen and yet powerfully all around us. ha ha
My skills as a human may soon be un-required as computers get smarter and smarter. It is cool and super weird...I will continue to make soap for us!

Also the gender thing..freaks me out. I can't say, "that girl" any more or that is girly..ha ha ha now it is feminine and I must choose my language wisely..
Such things and I get a little bit confused..I think that Tumbler  has exposed a huge iceberg like form or awareness, I am not sure what to call it..but it is here in our young people who are ready to change the world and my archaic opinions won't matter a bit.. it is certainly worthy of notice and a chat.

How does our mind work so that we group like this. We have these groups of humans that hate each other so much over the color of their hats or if they are rich or what they preach about.

How about be healthy wise and kind to all humans?
How about your countries people who died 100 years ago, or 1000 years ago, you put that away now and work towards real honest strength for all  and know please finally put the coffin on it  and I know most humans will not won't no way..they will not stop relying on a god who never showed up for them.
Who never paid for the furnace when it broke, and who never even shed a tear when Jewish babies were being smashed against a wall before their mothers and fathers were starved to death and then gassed to death after that.
Seriously how mean is that? He never showed up. We made that happen..some of us..don't even get me started on the native americans and how they were treated..jeez and we pretend they helped us..they did.

I wonder why we are so forlorn that we grab anything that can fill us and make us feel loved?

I will make you feel love babies..for reals.
I will make good food and make it so tasty.
I will make the best soap ever with blue tansy and more
The old whore
like the fougere'
like the chypre blends I love

I know it is time to remember the good things..there are many for me..
I no longer cry as much
I am surrounded by love and support
I am very cool
a cool old whore babies..

Did I ever tell you the story of the old whore?
(it takes strength and fortitude to call something a name like "old whore")


Saturday, November 25, 2017

Black Saturday normalmente

I was thinking I would say something witty
something rare and invoking, evoking making you cringe a little bit you know?
Is it scary of hurtful or is it funny and truthful?
I am a messenger..

We had the family here for the food thing on thanks giving..
yes, there were a political argument or two. I listened. When you have two passionate minds colliding it is time for the anastasia to soothing by taking people down to what is real.
I told the story of the attic where  the family had to live and they had to stand in line to get soup and when the momma made pigs head dumplings and they were so good the whole neighborhood came to buy one and then the government took away the right to sell pig's head dumplings.
This is what I always remember on these days when we have the luxury to claim a side and fight for the can all change in a breath of a wind..
I hope that you check it out if you want to.
the attic

Also check out some of my work this month at my etsy site..I look really nice :)
Dont spend all your money on a tv, get a soap or three from me, xx

Monday, November 20, 2017

so many things to say

I am of a mind to say more though..about soap and what is up with the murru murru butter?
It is hard and smelly like a hot man and a one timer..nuph
murru butter soap murru murru murru murru

I think you should try some of the soap I made with him, murru murru,  and see what you think.
I am working on the vanilla tobacco blend so bare with me. It is just not what I want yet.  I liked the dry off yesterday and I am on a pretty good track with what I want to feel when I put this blend on.
In soap, there are things that do not have to follow perfume ideas. In perfume oil, things will never be like the alcohol sprays. Just learns and adjusts accordingly. In soap, you use large amounts of your dominant oil and pour hard because you want the patchouli to melt on you with the bubbles of soap organic shea and coconut oils. I want all those things. In perfume, I want something now, the top note, and something a lingering memory.

It needs more cedar wood I think or even some woodsy item not spruce, maybe pine. No, not pine.
Pine is super nice with frankincense and a drop tangerine. yummy

Tobacco vanilla notes are listed somewhere or everywhere as I tend to write things down on napkins and scrap paper as much as I write in notebooks. I wish I were more organized in that way. dang man...

This blend, I put in soap.  I saved back some of the blend to make a perfume oil.  I hope to make it nice. Vanilla is the key here and how it meshes with the overly sweet tobacco and tonka.
I want there to be a little bit of almost sick discomfort, fear and desire and that is why I added jasmine grand from India..the best I have had in years. (eden)It is the epitome of what you'd expect from a flower like jasmine and in such beautiful waves and layers of floral tones.  It hides in this blend but good.
It is the vanilla and  cedarwood that lend themselves to make the stable carpet of sweet delectable dirty and memorable encounters..:) we might have to enjoy  as time develops the molecules and mixes them each day to become more what they intend to be.
I do not really want leather here.  I want soft whispers of hidden secret scent molecules just waiting to accept each other and carry on.

I love this, my true work!
I get so excited and happy at the same time..
I say too much.
I love you!

Monday, November 13, 2017

I love vegan and have been vegan and now I live like a french person, what?

Libra loves luxury and eating well.eathing butter and bread are the most fullfilling things one could eat.
And as it goes, these evolving days,were are needing to be gluten free because we feel better. Vegan because blood sugar..
I get it and believe me I have gone through changing my diet due to migraines and guess what? It was me making my head hurt not the bread. It was me holding jaw tight as to contain my angst..yes I have it..the anxiety that comes from fear hormones and dwelling in a flood of muck all the time!

I think Scorpio just wants stability and to relax without fighting because dude, don't pick a fight a scorp..shit! It could be because they tend to be right with a
Look,  I love astrology, it is the best myth around! Archetypes exist..
Like my boy Thomas..
He dresses like he is going to be on a ship somewhere or on a golfing outing! so cute! Taurus is adorable, yo!
Oh except when (another older and should be kind Taurus) they go on my Instagram to preach about their passion and then I get pissed..really? You chose instagram to project your political agenda on my Instagram and yea..I thought it was rude if not douchy..
I will not block either. He will learn to be respectful. I keep telling him,  "I am a cook, you fuk, don't make your diet my religion! I eat like a cook! A little bit and a whole lot of making!
I study cooking. I have studied escofier and all the french cooks including Julia Child who studied them..I have cooked for weddings and banquets and served so many people and now because you are sick and cured from your blood sugar after years of drinking, smoking and eating fast food cooked by other people, you are passing along good information..go to the  facebook then, facebook is perfect for any cultish following..really, my soup with the mushrooms..please, it was delicious, made right for ramen..I am trying to study Asian for ten years is delicate and hard and fast and so interesting. I have wanted the perfect broth you see, the kind you dip noodles in..I have never made a perfect batch to be proud of yet. Each time I miss the mark because perhaps I am too Greek and set in my ways.
The more I study cooking, the more I see my mothers talents when she was a young woman, she cooks like escofier all day. At the end of the day, it is all about the gravy.

I want to live like a rustic french person even tho I am greek,
with a little bit cheese and good bread from wheat which is grown right there and I want to enjoy that meal with a tomato and maybe a fresh very fragrant cucumber which sparkles in your mouth and you would put a little salt on that, pink, Himalayan, mmm
you would cut each piece with your knife as to not make a big mess
that is the finesse with the knife
Like when we were by the river and you caught some blue gills and we fried them in butter on a fire and it was dleicious
with salt and sex I suppose
maybe that is why things are delicious
maybe well fed men are more randy

Saturday, November 11, 2017

good day my November friends

It just got really cold here in southern Michigan! Best soap craft weather ever. When it is too hot outside, the soap gets all mad and hot, truth! The best soap takes its time, gently, slowly and no stress.

"Gratitude is where I dwell"

I made all the clay and salt soaps and today some more exotics..
Too many details make things common so I won't speak of them:)
I organized my labels and burned all the old ones. Nothing stays the same babies. every soap is to be unique in its own time not a soap labels from 3 years ago..
Man I love soap making! I have made such nice soaps through the years here on earth. I have..I am super confident in that.
Do I have batches that were ruined  lingering in my brain? Nope! Why worry about such trivial short lasting things? Why ponder on your mistakes so much that you call them a new name in order to mold yourself somehow, to be timid and meek? Maybe we all do it. I am not timid.

I had a review with the door closed at my job..they have worked with me for ten years but now that there is a script they must abide by, I am not confident enough they said! OMG! I am shocked..but okay!
Me?? Not Confident? Yes, it was spoken in words through a mouth to me...

Cunning wordmanship for something they demand from me. It sticks like nothing else. Everything else they said to me was like when Charlie Brown showed his parents talking.."whack whaak whack...not too many on shelf, not enough on shelf, too many in back, too little now, why to little, whaac whack whak??"
Me not confident, really??
They preceded the interaction with a warning about my reaction to the critiques..
It makes me put my head down automatically and then they shut the door like we are going to talk about brain surgery or something but it is really me and what they want.

I am writing about it because I am considering  stepping down and just taking the pay cut. This is a prod from the gods ())) that it is time to grow the right way and please, no cameras..goddamit, they are everywhere.
Me? Not confident??
"I am an artist" I told them that when they said I am not confident. Was I made to get up at three so I can scan vitamins and shampoo? Yes, for the money, and no for the teeter totter of retail buying?
Well, if I am going to be not confident about something, this is really about the best thing I can be not confident about! Seriously, I loose sleepover such silly things!

"I dwell in gratitude"

Here is what I think and you can judge me or not..I think we are turning so corporate and so cold inside  that our persona changes in that arena. It is theater in war.. money and business is theater. Christmas is theater and Thanksgiving, the most lucrative billions of dollars industry! It is theater. the turkeys all die  and some ass will bring back a frozen one and we have to throw it away.
Thanksgiving for grocery stores is more money than Christmas, which I have been since 1983 when I started at Zerbos with Harry Zerbo and Clair and we cared so much about spirulina then. Not some magic formula on the TV by DR Oz who called everything a "miracle" because people never learn anything they just watch TV. Yes, friends the masses..they flock!
And no, I will not make this about religion, but seems like we do create this case..the god is the camera and the computer and the scanning device which knows how many steps I take and from where..
ah modern times/modern problems..first world problems.

I dwell in gratitude.

Sunday, November 5, 2017

Scorpio and sag make me love roses

Look, I rant a lot we all know this, and at the end of the day I will listen and change my mind if need be. If it is best!
Scorpio energy is stubborn so we need to take that indignant and transform it in to something workable and better..
we do not go back for some sacrifice or martyrdom because we are weak women or some dumb crap.
I learned that having gone through two husbands.
I asked my cousin Pete, RIP Pete, why these men want to treat us this way? He said they were weak and got violent because of their own failure as men..anyhow, He is gone. his words like a puff of smoke..point being,
a person can only be held down so long and then they will fight back!

We are only a product of what our parents introduced to us and made us live by. My mom had her limits with the church right from an early age. She can always see reality better than me and yet I see her flaws and how she will give up and say the words, say them and follow along or else..papou too. I find that when fear keeps us from expressing our true thoughts, because of violent outbursts by the listener, I find that there is a despondent reaction to do nothing and say nothing. We all do that.

My ma!
She cooks she does her thing..I love her.
I think again, at the end of the day, there is nothing wrong with staying home and cooking all day..sometimes..
This is not really about my mom even though she made an excellent spaghetti the other day!

I want to tell you that there is rose here and I am drawn to it and want it all over me. Why don't we have a rose cream anyhow?
The thing is, that Bulgarian is what I want! Rose otto Bulgaria..OMG, just every wonderful exploding rosy thing,  it is!
Rosy Bitch Cream

rose otto bulgaria

mango butter
grapeseed oil
raspberry seed oil
avocado oil

Saturday, November 4, 2017

November Happiness and all the goodness to behold

There has been a shift. And humans are so driven by it and by each other..we are doing and working and striving to be adequate and dare we dream big and say strive for excellence..?

please no..please let us always be hungry for more, open doors, open hearts and minds for those who were outside for so long
open hope for our children's healthy futures and the grass which naturally grown
let us never just accept certain
lies of my people or those
 respect comes from me first and then you..please keep your culture on those terms
lets not forget that love is respect and the heart will always show on the face of the one who speaks..
let us always attend to what is real and keeps our kin safe, healthy and well fed..sweetness in life!!
Sweetness in life melting over each other like a butter balm from that is livin'!

I am in high company with you. I am very happy, very much!
Thank you for allowing me to enjoy yours!

Tuesday, October 31, 2017

thin vale of earth and sun happy birthday scorpio babies mine

For those of you that may not understand Samhain or  Halloween it just means the light of earth is perfectly in line with being just under the line of our sight in the northern hemisphere.
Humans, people made it magical.
Is it magical?
If you think an entity will come and serve you somehow, no..I have never seen such "miracles"

Is it wonderful to set your mind to the tasks at hand for winter and the cold?
It is crisp at first and then it is not.
It is a thin vale..yea...
Enjoy this night and think about what you will learn while hunkered down..hunkered down I say!

I am making something for winter and Scorpio's need for incense with a crispy  electric tone..Sagittarius' need for class to behold, Capricorn's needs to serve and do a good job..not sacrifices..choose what works for you. Nothing should hurt or be so hard as to be a struggle..
With planets in Libra now and this is very nice for her, Libra I mean..she gives way gracefully to deeper meanings..

We must have some oils which will serve us with these characteristic intensities...

Sweetness In Life Mango Butter Cream
rose otto (one drop)
cinnamon (not cassia, one drop)
balsam fir

Does that kind of get your mouth watering just thinking of it?
You know, I love labdanum.
With rose otto! MMMMM I am making a hair oil just with absolutes..only ottos..mmm
(Bulgarian roses are stunning and do not compare to Turkish and I use must as Bulgarian is 10 dollars a drop)

Monday, October 30, 2017

Pisces the rock star of today

Quiet stealthy and always always sees through your shit.

That is Pisces

You get a flighty Gemini Libra combo and you might have illusive, hard to get to person. It is better for them.
People say Libra is flighty or flip flops..yes, for which oil she loves more toady..for life things,  for life decisions like taking all her kids to Costa Rica to follow a foolish abuser..oops
that is me
People say, oh anastasia, "you have had such an exotic life". Yes because when you leave the safely of home, there are strangers and let me tell you this among the thousands of words and ideas I attempt to convey, nobody is gonna love you more than home, a good family friendship, not some stupid thing about dying races trying to retain their genes so hard..
There,  in the jungles, there were vagabonds and wife steelers ready to take over and it was The Americans and other ex pats who took over.
Most ex pat women came home with the kids and the men stayed with the mistress and drinking every night..and the penis..course

My mother raised me to make bread not drink in a bar every night ..oh wait, that is who made their bread every night, me! ha  ha
I walked home at 1 am and had to and it was breathtaking and night, it was scary.
I got to see humanity from a new perceptive and it changed me slowly in to a stronger person because after all my love and power of love and love love love of Shiva, Yogananda, I let it go and found that love is something altogether unnecessary in any of it. In fact, I say one must finally look at danger with disdain not some compliant drone pretending everything is okay.
You look at them and say, no, not me no way!

My sandals broke today and I walked in the rain and none of the expats who passed me by even stopped along the way
I walked in the dark fearing the ghosts but it could have been a big cat stalking me
I took it for granted every night
and then one day I called my mom
I told her everything
I told her how they were
how a local stole my best knife
it was so big almost a sword
In those lonely quiet moments
i listened
I sang
I sang songs to direct my brain
I passed the big house where some Hollywood guys lives

a big giant place with fences and bridges that they had to blow up a mountain so he could have it
They all fight to this day for water as there is not enough and the money crunchers, they wait they drink beer and they deliberate.

Saturday, October 28, 2017

It is time to make a fire

You had better. Light a match if you have to but do it.

Well it is to ignite a force of thoughts with in your brain so that you can make them happen..your thoughts are your intentions.

What are your intentions, anyhow?

Sometimes the future is shaded with unknown yet to be experienced events. It is really what you are doing with your life now that will reveal the results now, right now..what you made yesterday and how it will touch someones skin. What you kneaded with your hands and whose shoulder needs a a tug from and clean deeply satisfying hand.

What are you refusing to see?
Why do you make things hard?
What are you refusing to see?
Is it a child you birthed? Is it me?
Is it the corporate trash that rules you 8 hours a day?
Do not cry for them, they are not your friends!
What are you refusing to move forward from?
Your head might hurt from squeezing your thoughts too tightly and then you are all achy all over?
Which thoughts are you squeezing so tightly? Which ones are frozen and won't budge?

Why do you cry for the wrong things? Like?
New clothes and new purse and better hips and better lover mate for sure because I have not met more than ten good men in my lifetime.All the make up and but firming will not make him love you more. All the fight to change your children's mind about you won't make them love you more..they won't love more till they are past 24..truth! They love you enough now...

Sorry boys but you suck!
While we fight for the romance and nurturing and birthing  your babies, you think working for that makes it okay to  and fuk other have so many pathways to do  those things now a days, and since the beginning of cities..really... you are lost in your filthy fat world of greed lust and fitful feelings of happiness. You come home and pretend you are good, after even all that. It was and is so!
Ladies, you know it is true..a good man is one who makes  home improvements not sitting in front of a screen trying to troll women and porn..
How many of us have heard, "I pay for all this"
I think that is is good to have our own thing as to never ever be abused in that way.
Tyranny is subtle and then you find it it every corner of every activity you share.
Morning must be hard to accept for men like this because some still wake up and reckon with them selves, yea? Do they think about  the night before and here is where there will be  sweeping  it deep I inside the brain and color it something else in order to feel better..and they'll go  about the work day in modern times all the while strutting with deep dirty secrets..
What too much man hate?
I do not hate men, I have sons and yes they are dumb, really dumb sometimes. Do not think I have not thrown a few swords at them (words)!
I expect them to be honorable and greedy for knowledge and not some pretend worlds where they live to be worshiped by women.
I hope that at least three of my seeds of wisdom have penetrated in their brain and someday it just sprouts and they see things differently perhaps or they change their mind about certain values not fitting in our civilization as easily as they used to.
My daughters, are fierce and so smart. we will talk of them another day.. I have raised them to see injustice and question everything.
It was the books and it is still the books!
I am reading Thomas Payne next!

I hope you have a wonderful fall fire pit is ready!

Wednesday, October 25, 2017

The brothers karamazov

I am not a great or even marginally good writer. I just get excited and want to tell you all that is on my mind. I am a talker too. I talk to people all day and lately they will write me. I know I can manage my thoughts to cast them in to my products, to weave and to say and to ponder and to listen too..I love you!

The Brothers Karamazov..each chapter is so complex and so beautiful written that I am in awe and have to go back and ponder on these ideas so eloquently put together and always about God, what is he, why is he and what is reality..I am not done with the book yet. I can only take a couple of chapters and I am saturated..
Ivan goes on about why he questions the church and god and Iotia is a monk in the monastery..that was school in those days, man! Orthodox Byzantine Orthodoxy..
I know these things because I was immersed in the church since the beginning in my village. The priests were allowed to beat you! Ivan goes on to give examples of humans creation of what is right and how God wants the young boy who threw a rock and it hit one of the dogs of the chancellor or some guy in charge,  and the dog limped for a hard could a child throw a rock, hey? Well he freaked out about his dog and then asked who did it and they took the child from his mother and put him in a dark cold room for the night and then in the morning they brought him out and made his mother take off all his clothes and made him run as they set the dogs on him and tore him apart in front of his mother.
later she got on her knees and said he  was a just lord..
Can you imagine the fear of a child all alone in a cold closet in Russia? He was about six,  I think.
Ivan says that we created our image of else could such cruelty become?
It makes me shudder in fear of what some humans must have gone though in just the last 100 years.
How if you think our world is bad bad now and has no morals well, look at  how we are free of tyranny on that level.

Each inquisitor goes in the the jail cell before they would burn heretics alive to recite why god wants them to die this way because they simply spoke freely and the church heard about it.
They would say, "you stay silent..blah blah..God...blahh"

Yes it hurts me and while we decorate for Samhain Halloween and celebrate our harvests, we should look in to the part of our cells that have memory of  women's suffering and men's blood poured all over her belly, her creases and her mountainous breasts and all while she feeds and breathes for us..our mother earth is not a person or a goddess or some god that can save us..she is organic made of billions of years of broken and reconnected particles to make continents and enough dirt for us to respond to..I love her more every day that I am here,
she is dirt, dust, peptides and high tides
 I want her to  be happy, I want to know what is actually  sacred, like each thought I  may weave to create a beautiful day and to make a grand design of my own filled with all sorts of self created options..
How can I not enjoy all of them, I must, that is my duty for now....

Saturday, October 21, 2017

today I woke up got up and felt the spin of Earth

I knew it was going to  be a great day, right. Shake things up and all that, I thought to my self.

I have made some adjustments in my life since last we spoke.
Came to some conclusions.
Had to alter my plans slightly..
This is ongoing and always leads to a shake up. Like when Amazon bought Whole Foods. I stayed quiet because the whole thing is out of my hands.
"How is it?"
"How do you like it now?"

I can deal, what ever!
Who cares anyhow, right?
The red tape required for my compliance has been met with and...what ever!

It will be three years from now when I will leave that place. I think we should think about making eleneetha's a wider spread hot whore of a woman where is shall  radiate her wonderful scope of ideas  to all people on earth who enjoy luscious sultry heavenly suds..yes!!
Like our mother earth she will say,
"Plow in to my sudsy vulva
Enjoy the wondrous secret gifts I give."

This will be my mantra for a while and I hope it inspires you to buy more things and your words and ideas will flow easily though space and time to reach hungry many luxurious bodies and minds.

Have a wonderful day!

Saturday, October 7, 2017

boil and bubble as my cauldron sputtles along

I am right now in the middle of a project distilling myrrh. I ordered a kilo and well, we might as well use it up. It grinds different than frankincense. It is softer and harder at the same time. Once ground up, it feels oily and even buttery.
First, know this, I am not even close to being close to being a great cook or distiller but I say, it is wonderful to try.
I try hard as we all might know. I make good food so how else could this go?

Myrrh. I want to tell you about it and I want you and me to experience what it is.
very smokey at first
I almost thought it was too much you know?
As the steam built up I could see the drops of water coming down the glass tubing and allowed it to continue. It has been about 3 hours so far and we are no where near the end point. The water is thick and oily. I smelled it till 2 am on my hand..the left one, the one I try things on.
There is a bitterness to myrrh. that is what breaks down some of the hazy daizy days from our brain.
There is a softness which came later as the material broke down and became steam..a little sticky.

Myrrh, further more , is very calming. It brings a calm which makes one understand without having to proclaim anything. (by "one" I mean me))
I find myself wanting to speak but too tired to admonish

(some lady came in and gave me political cards so I can put the president in jail with her))

"please, no, you are not going to make me hate anyone" I thought, and took her card as to be polite and threw it away later.

I learned that phrase from a smart person. it stuck with me.

The witch says nothing until it is her time to speak, I will  get better at this.
Speak to your higher self, it never defeats you.
For sure the time will come when you will
you will,
myrrh is about moving forward
or so we say and  the time to cast is here right now and every day

you will speak what your heart says and delight to the highest realm of your realm
tell me this, what does your heart say?

the witch she has will
to cast ideas
to create  a platform for wisdom
being quiet
eyes that weep, yes
they will  borough in to your heart and find your truth without words
the kinds of things that make a home where heartfelt and loyal love abides over the sorts of
testosterone raged vibes.

The time is near and nearer yet
the darkest night
the time when you face you shadow
love the dark one inside love the lighthearted  ideas you might always describe
smile at me more often
I hope you do
I am going to check on my brew...



Monday, October 2, 2017

Samhain Casting fall and the big stuff

I will try to contain myself. I will try.
I am going through my mind to choose what products I will highlight this season.
Samhain is going to be awesome this year!
I am getting the fire pit ready each day but gathering wood and baby, I am going to light that thing!
It will smell up the neighborhood with holy water and frankincense sizzling (continuing to sizzle) while I dance naked around the fire chanting, "Oh me my  goddess with in, rise up and win me over :)rise up and spread your fire in every hungry cell, burn out any dark thoughts of fear and fail"

I have been distilling frankincense. I order it from a man in Yemen and he ships fast. @lubanfrankincensesupplier  DHL is expensive, yes  and  his selections of frankincense are wonderful. I say, I can't stop now!
I only got about 1 little of hydrosol out of 16 ounces of frankincense tears. Maybe I am using too much per cook? Nah!
I am calling it a cook because it really is a long time boiling and steaming and dripping and smelling wonderful silky notes of piny, churchy, holy like..crisp, peppery, deeply tell me.
Hey, I was raised in the church. There were nice things about the rituals.

My hungry cells are yearning for your reality, your honesty and never could be jealous or vengeful. Those things bring only sadness and hurt feelings.They always do..see? You can escape and still observe them as wrong and never right.
Also, and they say this in every language, you are who you run with. Must be why I have you still loving me after all these years.

 I love you. I want to always please you and bring you smelly things so that I would rub your hands and your feet
I want to nurish you with words that fill your mind
I want to show you that being kind is being kind
always you  see, they are in your mind
what comes though your lips has weight
what comes from your heart has pain
from longing and desire
and feelings of things  you haven't even felt yet.
Throw them in the fire!

The Hojari frankincense tho..dude! I don't know, I am so in awe of distilling it is crazy.
I am right now cooking the last of the ground of (goo) of frankincense (crack). After hours of cooking, this material becomes like glass almost, like candy. It is crumbly and crackly and I have been dumping it in the fire pit where it will burn clean and with the wood and make me so happy you see?

Casting is casting, it is planning and thinking and quietude.

Sunday, October 1, 2017

"hello" chilly fall nights and new ideas for skin

I like stuff that helps my skin and makes me smell good. I know, I am making lemongrass soap and even using it. See, we can all change and love everything if we want to.
It is wonderful on the skin. So open your heart to lemon grass!
It has raspberry seeds..yummy..

I say, the old whore is brilliant this batch and if you get one, you will be washed with something freeking amazing. I sometimes cast that batch for a longer than usual time.

Organic Vetiver Soap
One of my best batches ever.

Casting, collecting your thoughts and collecting the ingredients which form small yet profound realities..

Casting, spreading rumors not based on reality and only to promote yourself.

"Unknowingly" Casting To Manic Crazy people.."saying every thought" and then wondering why the wrong impressions about you.

Remember about this, every experience does make you smarter. so that you never should never have to engage on dangerous grounds and then cry if you're  hurt by the sharks or the manta rays that can dig up any crab beneath the sand.
(We are all  but food and sex..another little rant idea  right there :)
We are in an ocean of everything and you and me are but a smallish spec and where we all (Earth) are is a small blue dot in space filled with dark matter which holds us all.

Casting is now, it is developing higher skills which retain the thoughts which we mold in to realities.
Casting is being in a secret and hiding for a while. it is honing and it is becoming real. You are real, that is for sure. You are what you always wanted to be. right now. You should be proud of this.

(Fromm Walking Dead ideas)
Remember when father Gabriel said things about  Rick and tried to make him look like a dick in all of Alexandria and Michone had to knock him out because he was in a rant and all covered in blood from fight with the porch dick?
What was he thinking when engaging with the married woman? Dangerous waters my friends lead to facing real dangers.
Rick, he got it together and really got sick and tired of having to constantly bow down to old standards. he chose to be who he is.
I am not Rick and the zombies are in my own head.
by the way, the smartest fish live by hiding and planning their activities..
I know I have been watching a great show about sharks on Netflix!

Saturday, September 30, 2017

hello my beautious lazer mindz

don't be sad about the truth
laugh and laugh super hard
like a penis

You can say those things in your own blog, huh?

Look inside right now, in your head. Stop reading this and pick out the thing you are gnawing over. Do you focus on that one thought and cry as it tears through your gullet and back  to your gut? That is right there, that is Adrenalin and if you can master the rush from that poison or what people call the flight response, that, is what one might call enlightenment.what ever that means. Enlightened, Seriously? To what? When our star will goes red giant and melts us all in to smithereens or when we collide with Andromeda, there may be some problems?? No man who is here meditating in a cave or dead  as a saint can stop that. That is truth..anything else your brain may have conjured up is hearsay, I say.

 play smart and work hard
like a penis

Sunday, September 24, 2017

I saw you

In my dreams and in my mind I have visions what you are and who you are..In reality  sometimes and maybe even often, they fit:) to the truth, yes they do and you are super sexy, you do know that, don't you?

Recently as always my life is so fast and tightly packed in, clean life, family, oils...the grass. The tree they cut down and left it here, the fuks, :) Now I have to call them back to finish the job, that is the trick.
Sometimes having  a stronger physically, mate can be helpful. My husband was like that, where no one would try such, I expect and trust and smile and love and they think I am weak and they get to cut down my tree. I have been laughing about my naivete' all day. It was like that one time I was in Nicaragua and the taxi guy, in the middle of a two hour trip said I can get out or pay more money to get to the town..he smiled too. I gave him another $20!

Today I have  time to nurture the eleneetha in me and you..

Here is my menu at

A great bar of soap, and a perfect after oil for just about anything you want.
That is how I have been training my business. It has to be. Great skin care is simple and should always as much as you can, be organic.

I want to make more money for sure so I can buy some of the oils I am reading about. I love petitgrain sur fleurs; Citrus aurantium var. amara (synonym of Citrus x aurantium L.)it means the leaves of  distilled with the flowers. It is expensive and so good with patchouli! I love it on a man with a bit

The oakmoss with rose soap is gone I think..maybe one left that I have tucked away for someone would would like it.

I did make a fabulous oil for that blend. I will post that and more this morning on the menu.

Rose, vetiver, oakmoss, patchouli and a drop cedar wood..deep and little dirty, a little bit.

It lingers, the rose gets all dirty and it reflects a mood that we should all have. The dry down should be sweet musk mixed with pheromones  of one's unique mixture and it is. Warm, smokey, confident and real.
Dirty Rose Perfume  Body Oil

Monday, September 18, 2017

ideas and more Tatanka and Snake mounds

Tatanka and my snake mound. I love the way the word rolls off my toungue. Tatanka!
this is alfalfa and clover so I can nurish my mound for next spring..

she faces the snake and shows her rare beauty and says .."you live here too.."

there are so many bees here on this sweet autumn joy  sedum..bumble bees , honey bees, sweat bees..all loving this juicy one is fighting.

this is the snakes head and somehow a squash made its way in her head..

Respecting space and providing health to all and abundance to all..!

No, I will not dress up as a native american this Halloween. We all know what I am and pretending anything is otherwise.
Last year I made a joke when someone asked me what I am dressed as because you know, black dress, great hair..
I said, I am dressed as self confidence :)

Compared to most common men, I am. I know you are too.

Willow Witch is scary too..
she is kali and divine mother
and if you should swoon at her blue lotus feet too long
she may appear as as a snake slowly entering your true hearts mind
is that what you can want from her?
do you need the heart to be understood and then accepted as if "yea, I am am very good. I am doing good and feel really must mean divine"
If each thought has power to make electrical impulses and spark in the brain and spark a thought and a memory.."think" what is and what can be and how you are the master...and, how it is happening right now and you are you and there is another you in there running the stuff you are not even aware of..the other you inside..yes, say hello and pull the strings that must be pulled.

take a deep breath, hold it in, exhale it and open the eye above your brow inside there where it hurts sometimes to address the demons, your  dug in deep thoughts, that reside
to unfold and allow to  unfurl hidden secret longings of which you may be too afraid of their if a dragon escaping from a rocky crevice..
take another breath hold it
breathe out
not everything is  about you
and always about me

Wednesday, September 13, 2017

Raven speak

"There is a raven that comes to the tree above my grape vine
we often speak to each other
he calls out to me and I to him
he knows me and  he chants my way as he perhaps warns me of evil men
or to say, hey I am so glad you came now I know you'll dig some thing up for me
now sing me a song  lady mine
 bring me fresh water
bring me your sweet time"

I love rose soap in winter. I love rose soap anytime actually. real rose. no department store fakeness!

I started this recipe on etsy and never had time to write about it. It is complex because I am complex.
I really have been  so busy and yet aromas and soap are never far from my mind. You are never far from my mind.
My thoughts are about you, your movements and your stride and how you almost float with grace and poise..
I love the way your hair smells when you hug me. I know you are in my mind when I can inhale your vetiver and rose.
Is there anything more simply adorable?

I relished in the intriguing way the solar eclipse sent me, prodded me and as if a wind blew over me, under me and swept me in to a realm that while acquainted with, not realy privy to parts..yea..the world, making it and sharing the love from the top down..ah the top down..ha ha
Rules handed down by "experts" on the proper way to comply 100% and much used term lately in every memo..
Mark that little box and get on with your life is my conclusion. I don't know about you. Yes, they freak me out a little but every thing is about money as you as you walk out your nice big door.
The lunar eclipse came and exposed all of that..that is the common side of moon worship..every side is worthy of our time, yes?
 Yes but I want to make things and talk about it and make more things after that. That I how I plan my escape from the common. I linger on my plans, my secret plans to make something ridiculous and mind blowing. can I? Sometimes I feel like when I wash with a soap that explodes with a beautiful scent all over me, I feel over the moon with delight..the patchouli cacao soap makes me so happy at the moment. It is simply glorious to the moment.

 Raven Speak

I hold it in a long as I can and it  just burst out..all the feelings I have kept on guard as I channel the rose in this way....
 a beautiful cabin in the mountains with trees all over the place and a long cedar and oak tree lined walk way to the main entrance which is lined with roses at every step wildly climbing over the natural arches of oak trees and stone fences. It feels like a tunnel of deeply musky and airy at the same time and as you step out you can breathe in its simple beauty.

 I have a black almost black  vetiver and I have the most exquisite oak moss like ever in my whole life and there will be a few drops of this organic cedarwood oil that takes me in to the Virginia mountains. The scent of trees fermenting in the top soil, the perfume of mist in the air mixed with sweet fir and tangy, hickory, and fruity paw paw.. it has its own smell, each forest does! Like when I lived near the beach in Costa Rica, the smell of ylang ylang on certain nights was like a drug!

This is the North and winter is coming..:) Raven Speak                                                                           Rose Vetiver Cedarwood Oakmoss Patchouli...incense notes.

Wednesday, September 6, 2017

I hope you've enjoyed the full moon so far

Full Moon

Things build up during the full moon cycle which is right after the new moon cycle and that one was a solar eclipse and everything went from summer to fall..just like that!

The full moon shines on how you are scraping you stunningly at times glide through what might be tragic situations.
I feel that yes, as long as one intends and diligently makes dreams begin to become reality..there is the transition.  It is like passing from fire to metal and ice. In this case earth (Virgo) through mud and water. (Pisces)You respond how you respond to those things.

and always mindfully?

I hope..I know this, it is that  speaking your mind may be  the key to freedom and  I feel very free here and this blog anyhow. :)

What do you think about this below?

One of my artist daughters is displaying her art at a  street fair in Detroit , Dally In The Alley..ha h ha

I made these for her, for the fun of it...


I am a willow witch or at the least I aim to be
always learning to bend
always l;earning to control where my roots will attach or how they will spread underneath all the unseen wilderness of expansion
am I nothing but a photon then taking millions of years to break free and realize 
yet again and again
I am part  of everything
I always have been

Dally In The Alley..:)

I do not dally I am afraid..when I am done, I am so done..I rest like a queen Let the young ones do this for divine mother...
me me meeeee
willow witch of the not very north

Monday, September 4, 2017

peace contentment and knowledge

Labor day :)
In the olden days I would make a bunch of stuff and talk about it. I have no free time at this moment in  my life to ponder too much on too many complex notions I may have been brewing up through the year. or two..)))

Here and now is where I stream line my motivations and make really outstanding products that touch a you are showering and wondering how an ugly bar like this can send you off in imagination land where you become a new person instantly, thinking and sniffing, inhaling hard on the goodness.. it should be..:)

Something smokey for our special time?
Something resinous and rare and a little creepy dahlings?

Let us intend!

dragons blood
more dragon
dragon's blood runs cold
dragon in my eyes
I leaped over the dragon's wings

lets us intend our final orange blossom journey
I have only a little bit left,,orange blossom white rose body cream..mmmmm

Let us intend our righteous power, our undeniable connection to something greater than words like hope

mastery of our minds is beyond such silly notions
be in control of each idea
each thought
each "why"

Be a master of yourself before you look out there for someone to lead you.
It feels really good to be taken care of but that is must nurture you body and  your mind always and then always use pure essential oils and actualized your thoughts with each breath a little closer to peace, contentment and knowledge.

Sunday, August 27, 2017

Hello Virgo

We are already shifting towards the harvest. I am going out today and picking all the peppers and I will pickle them for the winter.

lady soap maker went out one day
 to see if her garden grew
she picked all the veggies and the cucumbers and onions too. the garlic, the juicy redness and meaty tomatoes and she sang them a lullaby too. They love that. She thinks they care about her.

The days grow short and mid day gets hot and the nights are crispy cool
condensation adorning each new bud..they will not make it.
you want them to
they try
you both cry
take a deep breath
and here here is where hope makes its  preparation
where minding what is real becomes easy
where clean up is beautiful and everything you touch becomes more gorgeous each day
where sparkling light makes you seem that way because your thoughts have transformed you in to this moment
your face so peaceful
you close your eyes and breath in all the good, your body tension leaves you and you can accept what you  have here and now..right now..
and yet like a sweet just forming bud, too late in summer, knowing this , accepts and yet demands true space in space..your face is adorned in the same way..each line be it deep or just forming.

lady soapie went out one day and knew her garden would grow
she put in the time
her hands dirty and sweat glistening in the sun
there is no way it wouldn't, you know

life is a garden you hands and the things you touch your fruit..I want sweet juicy ones

and now here is my real poem
about moles

something lingers
lingers in my garden
its sweet little teeth taking sweet little bites from my tomatoes
He leaves little tooth marks on each one that is not ripe
he goes for the juicy the sweet and the ones I would keep
he dug a tunnel  right under one such fruit
he just ate from his front door
so cute
he begs for my pardon

Monday, August 21, 2017

and what a feeling HAPPY SOLAR ECLIPSE

How interesting that this last week was a doozy, yea?

This is rose of sharon, or wild hibiscus..I love it and they tell me it grows like a weed and I am glad. Let her cast herself across my whole yard. she  is really stunning! 
Her flowers, they close at night and open with the sun. 

Glory! Perfection! Pay Attention, be free of fear again and again!

Be stunning and be real
Be happy that you are here
what ever is divine
let it be what it is
nothing to do with you for sure
make your own divinity I say
what ever you want
make it real with each thought
with each thought, transform it in to a real idea
with concrete value
with loving intention
with hands that linger on the good
with mind that proceeds with reverence for nature and her beauty of which you are one with..


Saturday, August 19, 2017

you made me cry

guys get something clear and I mean the few very sexist men I have encountered in the last month or so.

Please and Thank You!

 I will say anything I want and you do not get to be all do not get to make a ticking time bomb over a topic.

you do not get to be offended by my words about your religion
cover your head, I don't care
your vestments mean nothing to me
you do not get to treat me worse than any person in charge
especially your gods be they real or imaginary
you do not get to spread rumors about me
you do not get to treat me like a  servant
you do not get to engage in conversation
that only leads to war for any of the above topics
you do not get to be mean to everyone just because you are having a bad day
your mom may be dying  or whatever is weighing your mind..there are many things which weigh our minds
you seem to think it is way to be rough with people and you create drama and bad hurt feelings
who do you think you are, Caligula??

ha ha ha

sorry I had to bring this to you as I approach my 60's but it took that long to find words to reply to your unkind racist sexist what supremacist attitude.
I have known and not necessarily  in the "known" sense,  vile white men and vile black men and they all had a penis, they loved that thing and they still do. I am sure!

talk about everything yo

Thursday, August 17, 2017

back to school feels real

It has been a nice summer yea? We have all been working on something and it has been received.
Received..yes..have, has, been, gotten, there, and in a profound learning rush, received all the things coming to us.

I have been honing in some some temperature issues and the dry weather all summer has surely effected the time and reason to make things.
I am not in such a hurry to just make, but when I get that alone time the, oh so beautiful witch time..yes it is good and works like a perfect storm.

This is now, this is the time )
to look at what is up and clean up your work space
don't cheap to yourself iether
it can come quick as an opportunity and then you are like "oh, what should I do??"
Well, don't just take whatever comes like a leaf in the that seed that makes so many new seeds for the next a field of what ever flower you want to your own made proverbial seeds and then..go out of the weeds and stop crying all day..

Think of me, at four in the morning..:) here saying, "hello, you look great, you are great and you are doing great!"

My beautiful friend said it best..
"I don't care, you are not making me hate anyone!"

Wednesday, August 16, 2017

killer bee propolis and skin care


3 mls propolis  you have to get a  good one not full of alcohol. Propolis in dried form is available on Amazon. I have a little bit left of a rare batch.

Red algae that is from a good source.  I love red algae for the complexion. It brightens the skin and guess what, studies show that the red components in plants shield your skin further from the sun.

1/2 ounce bees wax

more or less on the olive

2 cups rich unfiltered olive oil

When I first started to make this I learned so much about propolis. It is rough and ready to serve but you must concede and do the prep. It needs to sit in heat and melt completely , low heat , in a water bath, and it needs to go clear and the essential oils are last and still, need to temper as the solution cools to a jelly.
Making balms is an art form.

Monday, August 14, 2017

my weird customers thank you

I like top shelf and that is what I like and you are and have always been the tops

you other medium shelves please step aside
you mean what you mean to your medium lives
your tacky pants and golf shirts aside

you lower shelf dweebs who think you are on fire
it is because your ancestors were ready to burn your carnal desires
your need to survive turned in to worship
of anyone who would serve you
would treat you as more
I  know your anger has taken you you to  a lower even lower shelf of
dredges and trimmings and the meat mist of your bloody requirements
no one wants those
they sit and dry out like a bad idea..get it..bad idea..thinking, doing, being a good person..

I hope your brain starts to see the reality
that we are 7 billion humans here and you yourself, dude, mean nothing

Wednesday, August 9, 2017

what is the point of making soap if you can not grow and use your own botanicals now and again

I have been making garden soaps. Homegrown garden botanicals for our nutrition and pleasure.

More of them are on the way and as much as I would like to tincture a bunch of the herbs that I grow,  I do not because I would rather spend the money on jars for you and not just liquids sitting around..I do have many tinctures and extracts already from people who make them.
I made some mighty fine sage soap and super delicious cucumber soap and now black tomato soap?
I will think on it and you'll be the first to know.
Tomatoes are in. August is tomato month for sure. Today I will test the still and see what I can make of it..

Tomato Hydrosol??
Cucumber hydrosol??
Lemon balm hydrosol??
 Basil hydrosol??

Shopping List
2 ounces basil oil
4 ounces lemon organic

2 ounces basil
2 ounces rosemary
2 ounces peppermint

2 ounces basil
2 ounces frankincense
2 ounces patchouli
1 ounce clove

What tickles your fancy in any of those scenarios?

Me, I am super okay..I hate my schedule at work and I hate the constant surveillance and monitoring and adjusting according to  higher ups all stressed out because if one mistake is made it means gray areas..Now listen this does not mean I am not happy. It means that I must look at reality and not some pretend happiness while things that make me unhappy are happening..get it? job..
It is a way to mass produce and be more impersonal than is reality in retail and business. No one is your friend in leadership. they could have been your friend before they became leaders but the air changes in a split second and you know your place.
My place?
 It means nothing and if I had a choice which I do not, I would stack fruit somewhere. At least it is honest. There is some art to it for real not just slinging boxes and crap for masses who rarely say "thank you".
Once in a while they come and will tell me how I touched their lives and how they feel so good. I am happy to hear it and glad some thing good went through besides the scan and the scans and the other scans for returns and more scans, oops, you have sign in again and again,  to see the price and another scan to detect movement so the drones can get here faster..let them but do not forget that it does not matter in the least.
Even in writing this I sigh and accept that I should not care as much. It is real the easy thing to do and we are being trained to be little box checkers..ughhhh
Have you checked the proper box today?

What is art though? What is it that we crave to be so outside the box that something like checking a little box  has us all up in a tizzy?
Well, it feels like brainwashing because it is.
While we need to be clean and efficient, we might loose some spark of joy each time we check the box as if it will give us a big will. Money! We check the box.

I used to say, "some money is not worth being made"..well..yes..which money?

I am now going to say, "money bring to me to us  good things, money loves you and then loves me and we are happy as can be, there are bees buzzing and birds singing..and winter is coming"