Monday, June 26, 2017

I am more conservative than you are

I cook and make soap and nurture..and yet, you,still think I am a "goddamn liberal"?
I make a garden and feed all my kin and talk to my mother and my sons and yell at them for being dumb. I work until I can't stand "no" more and then  I lay down and rest. I read and listen to people when they actually talk to me and not yell insults and crazy ass fits..get over your self. you cannot behave in such ways is what is and should always Liberal, huh??
He called me that and it was the last straw!
Yup, I guess so, because no matter what I say, you will not change your mind.

You are more liberal than you think.
We all are.
Sick? Doctors! Roads, water, to your house, toilet, where did he think that shit comes from,  oops, I mean goes? I know right?
Instantaneously? Like god made us!
One guy said to me,
"You sound bitter.."
I am a little that you get to sneak  in a corner and talk about how bitter I may be.
It is not bitterness if it is not you then?

Women need to step up. accelerate the pounding of man gorilla brain pounding his fists at other man gorilla brains as whose god wants more blood?

Wait, you are Christian and your god is love..I keep forgetting that part when you talk like you do.
People say that maybe I am stirring the pot but then I always have even when I was stirring another one last year..ha ha hahaaa I am just trying to figure out when I insulted you most? Was it when I said all religion are like children's stories and serve to intimidate..make humble and bind to a creed.

Yes of course you are in my prayers. My meditations and focus on what is and hopefully may always be your good..please flourish so that you don't get mad at me when I say things. I mean get mad, sure, do not say mean things and not use  my looks or some dumb weird thing. or feeling like "bitter"

Tell me right now that the hurt remains for past swords from your heart being too open and someone guts you like never before..How did you feel and still feel the pangs of hurt of someones hate toward you?

Guess what, I once got my ass kicked because they said I didn't love Jesus enough.
Guess what, once I wrote about shea butter (years ago when I was blue lotus moon)and because I said an adjective about the women in Ghana and how gorgeous they are and I got my ass beat because I was deemed a traitor for loving black skinned Africans! True story and if you think I should be gracious about that. Sorry!

To say that I hate Christians is strong. I do hate that they have committed many atrocities in the name of their god and for them to be noble and more noble than me..sorry, no again.When you put a scale in your mind like that  it never turns out,  "oh, you don't hate Muslims as much as "us"..therefore you are evil and liberal! "
I have aid it before, it is more like children's games than real life..

I guess I  am tempted a little to tone down my ideas but I do not know if I can. I will always want to share good news like how fats works and how soaps is made and how science is how! You computer right now is science and was never instantaneous. And if you think Donald Trump is your friend? I hope so. It would be nice. it sounds good but be aware, Mussolini also wanted  to make Italy great again. He started the Catholic Youth with the Pope of the day..right, many years ago was that?
Not many and we will change. Italians today are done with the wars. It messes with the ragu and how the pasta is served. I hope so anyway..I wish we could all just grow our food like the past and work and be a nice planet of rich healthy happy people.

Thursday, June 22, 2017

pulling the lettuce and making the way for onions.

I have been harvesting garlic and basil and dill and that is about it. My vine friends take time to spread out. I am training them to climb with things they were throwing out from work and my usual little nik knacks I like to put out there for the tomatoes to rest on. This year, hay and straw. Straw to hold moisture and hay to smell sweet and green. Think of sweet grass. hay is like that except when you have so much hay, you can jump on it? Am I crazy? You can put a soft blanket over it and look at the sky or the night stars making their journey through time like us. I would do that in the morning,like right now at this moment, it is 3:30 am. The only time I can be alone away from too many people to  be able to think of how much I love them all.:)

A recipe

fresh garlic
fresh dill
fresh basil
olive oil
put these all together in a blender and use with anything you like..grilled portobelloes and almost every other grilled delight.

I am not vegan, I was vegan and turned it around.
I have a friend who always brings up his ideas of perfection and said vegans are better people than meat eaters.
He can bite me because I am a fuking stellar human. and who is counting?
I bet that guy never worked a farm in his life. He never worked the ground. he is afraid to touch things. Americans may be afraid of dirt. i am not sure though:)
Who gets to decide what is sinful and what is not sinful?
Does your sexual past have really anything to do with your current love?
I hope not because if so you are bound by jealousy and hate from the get go.
The love part will fade in to bitterness and agony because you may not have gotten what you bargained for. Things change and your lover is really an ugly demon here to suck of of your good, your goddess, your honest, you worthy, your clean efforts.
Or at my age, men, well many  men are fuked up and still think they are young but too many drugs and alcohol and staggering has become habitual and here we are.
I will stop cussing maybe..:)

Today will be good. I will work
I will think
I will ponder
I will not stink like a fake cologne with ozone ugliness..ozone?? Why???

Monday, June 19, 2017


summertime thangs

I was thinking about things. I am sort of studying brain stuff some more and it makes me think about my inner brain and why I think and do the things that I do.
Why I am never really lonely unless too many people are there then I am lonely, really lonely because I know I stand out. None of them even have a glimpse of what a bad ass I am, have been or will continue to be as my badassery is my my secret and my stand.
I am learning my job better, and as you may have heard by now, Amazon bought Whole Foods Market. I am now an employee of  a global company. Coolness and whatever man!
 How do I feel about the sale of my beloved whole foods? Meh! Soon drones will scan vitamins and body care right in time for me to bank on my retirement savings and just make soap. Yes real people still want real soap made with good fats.. Corporate details are what they are.
Move along. I make money there and do a job that soon will be done by a robot and they like me so much they let me stay and talk to the real people that come in with every fuking complaint.
You know why they are so depressed? They are so fuking bored from doing nothing good that they come in there for a reprieve and comfort. They have nothing to do because money alone is not enough for happiness, you have to keep learning and learning and not be a lazy fuk, wondering who., next,  will do your thinking for you so that you don't even have the knowledge to get on google.

I had a letter written on the web site of whole foods requesting information on why toms of maine roll on is not available. Seriously? You already went to the internet to contact me. Go to Toms and ask them! Toms's roll on really? They made a new one 5 years ago. If you like it so much, why don't you know that? I am just sayin'.
Also if you are the type of guy that shops for his "queen"?? Nuff said about that kind of talk!

The new moon is almost up on us. This is a time of learning and remembering everything you learn. The new moon in Cancer.  It is about keeping what you have, allowing some  secret works to develop in to real usable skills for the next three months which will lay down the pathway for the next three years.

Wednesday, June 14, 2017

there are good things everywhere

I love this time of the year. Here in southern Michigan, it is has been unusually  hot and dry. No rain for days and now they are telling us that our water is not fit to drink. "don't worry though, it is nothing serious. just drink bottled water for a few days until we fix this."

What do they need to fix?? Well,  (well) The water levels dropped  because of the high temps and now all their chemicals are concentrated. they do not just say that in plain English. Contaminated with bleach and dioxin or what ever other poison they try to use in order to satisfy the ignorant masses. Who are these "they" any way?
This is what I am asking.

Water and food is what drives all mammals my babies and we are said mammals too. Because we are aware of ourselves is why we feel so special.
Most humans cannot even accept evolution so it is easy to sit in darkness and let others lead the way.
I would rather be in the fray, the out of the way, the developing secretly mammal  female to
works hard to make it right..for her little fray friends..:)
I am drinking bottles water by the way.

How about that? Imagine no water..
no baths
no soup
no clean underpants against your ass
imagine fighting to survive
no food store near by
to eat a breakfast or make a nice tea no sugar
no clean shoes
no phone to call your mamma
"mamma" like Lambert in that cartoon show
walking miles to get pails of water.
Imagine if you can and if it hurts you just a little to even think it..yes you have heart and
now, you can open it to share your thoughts your ideas and your art.

Monday, June 5, 2017

notice something?

My writing is getting better. At least sometimes. I know I tend to go off and rant but that may be my best thing in writing. I am not sure. I like poems too.
Like the one I wrote about some of the Patriarchal slime that lead our world as they always have, with violence and greed about their gods.

I called it Patriarchal slime because I heard a friend use that term about some leadership in our towns and head offices..

I might have to change some words but it goes like this..and when I say is raspy and low voiced beatnik sounding..

Patriarchal slime,

:) patriarchal slime I see you all the time 
your head held high 
because god is on your side
your shoes all shiny because you have it all
just as long as everyone abides by your own man made laws
the time has come for you to face
and not feel disgrace because your god does not care about you so boo hooo
pretty boy

I wrote right before all that stuff on the news about London and the fuks who are randomly killing innocent people who are living their lives.

I have told you before and believe you me, I hate the religion, all of them, especially  Islam but Muslims here in Detroit are fine. They work and are trying to make a nice home and make money and live a decent life. No one seems mad when I talk to them. Oh, and there are a shit ton of Jews down the road. A bunch of Chaldeans too..all from that region and yes, I find some of their habits distasteful like their constant "honey" but well, Greeks are obnoxious too..Oh yes, they are!
Their priests wear long gowns just as much and well, they also work near each other all these different people.The difference with western faith is that the priests wear that shit only during ritual, the rest of the time they are normal looking unless they have to wear the thing on their neck just to say who they are..subtle but still as poignant. The Greek priest I know, looks at his job as a job and has a family and they travel and look pretty in pictures. He seems normal except when he came top pray over my dad in the hospital that time when papou fell down the stairs, he said, in perfect English, "here John, this is myrrh fro Jerusalem" and he put it on my dads forehead. I reached over and asked to smell it..
Fake and so fake! My  dad thought it was golden myrrh from the most holiest of places. I said nothing. They know God but do not know the difference from real myrrh and a fake toy made to fool children! is true though.
You walk away from something like that in deep thought. Are we better because we review and change as need be?
I think so.
And I have said this before about how new generations do not want to live like that. They want music and dancing and nice looking hair and not just for dad and brother to see..creepers!
These few idiots who think they can change earth to their views are but a small spec in time. Future humans will remember them for what they are, apes with no education. because once you learn, there is no going back to make your self believe, you are in knowledge already, willing and open to all the best things for all people.

Saturday, June 3, 2017

hello and thank you

The more I read, the more I am grateful. I am grateful about my life and my heart's needs always being met.

Remember cologne guy? Well he dumped me because he does not want to dump cologne. Sigh..I mean on the one hand it was nice to have a dude fawn all over me and I know none of that is real. I have been around the block a few times and so I engaged to my horror. It is horror when these dudes come sniffing like they do. I  do smell nice and well, somehow Uranus struck again and I am in this weird friendship which secretly I found a little gross because it is so outside the box for me to engage with men.
I am a monk and I like it.

"Mom where are you going"
" I am invited by Ted to go to a movie"
"mom don't go, you won't have fun" They all chimed, their friends who come here often also rebelled at the notion.
" already said yes, Ted needs me right now, he is nice, I want to see if i like it.."
"you won't, mom, you know that."
Later,  I came home all perclempt and displaying asthma symptoms from the cologne. I thought it was Adrenalin and it was actually his perfume which choked me for two hours. Why would someone wear such heavy cologne is my question.
I don't know but I asked him to wear nothing and he got pissed of course.
I am sorry..I have issues and he could not adjust.
Needless to say, I am traumatized by the whole thing.
I can not imagine fishing for dudes like that and having to drop people and get new people because of some angst and loneliness thing that needs filled. Awe.
I am not lonely. I have never been lonely.

I think the thing is that I am a witch and men get scared of that.

As well they should be as I am not to be trifled with for too long.

"do you believe in Karma?"
"no I do not, I relate to the law of cause and effect"

I am Kali
I am Durga..

Thursday, June 1, 2017

Hello June first and how are ya

Do you know me?
I am not your native nor your blood
we are the same though
we are made of star dust and churned particles made by heat in our star,
so hot so so hot :) Like your hot bod babe!!

We are the same and should not be troubled
yet we dwell and dwell in anxiety and worry about silly little daily things that wreck us

We cry over our hair and our legs and our varicose somehow if we pretend they were never there we can actually make it happen by this "belief"

we love pretending as babies and to carry the tales of children to our adult years, we all do,  we want that and do it..
our fairy tales are just bigger and have a bigger price.

yes like karma in like reincarnation..
"anastasia, I am shocked, you do not believe in reincarnation?"
"no, I don't, does it really matter what we may have been?"
"yes I think so, that is karma"
" maybe it is "revenge"  dressed as free will and or karma?"
He walks away, pondering why he even talks to me any more..ha ha ha..
He wanted that all to be true we all do we all have.

have a wonderful day and remember how amazing we are, how smart and how go, have a  good dream in the deep darkness of twilight and make it a wealthy one a healthy one and where good  will to all reins."_)))

Monday, May 29, 2017

frankincense patchouli soap

I made some really nice soap for just a few of us.
I have really gorgeous patchouli oil right now and so as I was making some heavy duty  soap blocks I took a little of the soap base and put these oils..

patchouli big time so much that it is dark. Sometimes I am heavy handed.
choya loban

Right now,  I am getting is frankincense but I am immersed in clove and almond from my zanzzy nuggets I just!!

I have been in love with coconut milk. The kind in a can, so smooth and creamy, yea? I put it is a soap base  and it becomes so soft and creamy as I mix.Very luxurious.  It really adds a texture to the base as soon as you put it in. This last one, I used a  double cream coconut milk. Gosh, I am so in love.
Sweet yet no sugar added so you can use it as a topping on anything you like. Even as a dip with just about anything.

of course as i am, you can put it in soap.

Organic coconut milk soap base
organic coconut oil
organic olive oil
organic coconut milk
clean water
activator  n(mms lye calculator)( grow up, sodium hydroxide is what it is, a catalyst..otherwise you can go and melt blocks of glycerin soap.)

Thursday, May 25, 2017

I love May

It rains and the flowers are the most smelly. I have a lilac that one can smell about from the street. It is so sweet and good.

I am well and happy friends.
I hope that you are too. I am making a bunch of soap for Martha at The Well in Cape Hope. I love her. She has been with me for a long time and always gracious and generous we are for each other. I feel that way about all my  soap partners. You! We both make an investment for our skin care and it shows.

Etsy has changed a bit so if you have problems with the shopping cart let me know. I have had some glitches with the whole thing. Not bad but enough that I had to go and make a shipping profile because they deleted all of them..
who cares, it's over and I am awesome to be able to fix and not be a dumb old person who can't figure out

This week in soapmaking:
patchouli soap galore
patchouli frankincense rose geranium..oh man..
coconut milk shea with orange blossom
lavender patchouli  (moss on neptune)
cinnamon blood orange with ylang ylang and cocoa butter

There is a sale on the "euc pep" because I want you stay stay cool and wash your feet when you get in your bed.


Sunday, May 21, 2017

I colored my hair

laughing as I say this because well, for one year as I was growing my hair our out, people started to treat me differently. Truth.
I am in sales and do not wish to go and ruffle feathers of customers by not only my unfailing demands on their brains but just a\the few who are just mean in the first place.
"I am evolving"

I will likely let it grow out again or completely sheer it off.eventually, men hate that. Hair is sexy!

By the way men, just because Donald Trump is president and  likes to grab pussies, it does not mean you now get to call women more names than before! "cunt", 'Bitch" I have heard them twice this wee alone from men who shop at my store when they were referring to women. It is a trend when it is that often and I am keeping my ears open. Excuse me but, am I wrong to demand respect.
Men have been dicks though and we said it often enough and yes women can indeed be it just words then, or can they hurt us in a most deep and humbled way?
I am needing a sit down think for that one.

We must be something more you and I! We must strive to greatness in the most subtle yet profound ways.
We must endure our anxiety and not think for one second that we are safe. Nothing is forever. You have these moments right now to make some good memories. A twinkle in your eye can make sparkles appear for everyone who catches a glance directly. It is a beautiful thing and spreads as easily as anger.
Of which I have against all tyranny..hahaaa

Saturday, May 20, 2017

everyone loves cake

Madeira Cake

6 ounce butter, sugar, four eggs, a whole lemon peel, 7 self rising ounces flour 2 ounces almond flour..bake at 350 for 30 minutes or so..there you have an every day coffee cake tea cake and that is that.  it is like pound cake for dummies..and that is me. Now, lets us have a cup of tea!

I am good and doing well. The kids are all good and the garden is evolving nicely..
evolving, it the same really..Work is finally almost easy. I the
 only woman buyer on my team at 5 in the morning. The boys are on my ass all day.
"are you buying what you need?" "did you take my scan gun?" ( i did because they would kill mine and then leave m e with a dead scanner while they were all acting territorial.) "yea you want to fight me for it?)"
 I took all the labels off so they couldn't see
 which gun they were stealing. The caught me and I told them why I did it. Now and always,
I have a working scan gun. I made my stand and did not cower in fear. It helps that my  boss is 25 years old, smart as fuk and always polite..yea our life is okay. Would I rasher be tinkering in my  garden all day and making soap all day..dang man, I already do that..yes, dear ones, I am fine..sore a fuk and fine fine fine.

While we are aging we are evolving but if you use it to explain your actual age, I will think you are shallow ..just a little.
"we are the same age dude, you are aging too."
A close friend, close enough..
"I am evolving"
Me, that is also aging, do you really think you can stop it?
"I am evolving, Anastasia licious," that is what he calls me..ha ha ha
"okay but growing old is life boy"
He is grumbling now and pretending he has work to do so he does not have to face his lonely penis at  night..(okay, that is wrong to say))
It is so lonely that after years of being lonely, if he does ever get
 a real chance at a 24 year old, he might not react as amazing as in his porn dreams.
I find that men my age are really still randy and yet every day work tasks take their toll and at the end of the day, it is more work and the next day of hard work comes fast.
For all of us.

I think that women get trapped by what society worships so much that we color our hair and yes, we have evolved. We are doing men's work because it has become universal. You strength is not that required anymore in the service industry and most packages are made to be able to be lifted by anyone over 120 pounds.

I do not really have a point to my story only that I look and I observe and I react just as always, by bluntly pointing out ideas that may hurt some peoples feeling, better that than some lie made up pretending.
That is why I choose healthy
fats and healthy skin care.

Yesterday, I had an interaction with a girl, we will call her Maria..I mean yes, she asked a question which was pertinent.."is there alcohol in your cleanser?" "do you give discounts to first time buyers?"
My feathers get ruffled when money comes in to a discussion because it is already 13 dollars..I most likely loose money if you count the 2 dollar bottle and carrier I drive 60 miles to buy because I want the best things. I said i do not discount first time buyers and that I give a sample or two.
"which ones?"
Howe many?
I want neroli mist, rose cardamom soap as my  samples"
Uh, no I don't cut already cut soap and that one is expensive. Nor do I typically give oil or spray samples...6 emails later,
Dude!! something or not. I do not negotiate like some gypsy. Plus it is 13 dollars and now you want the rose and the neroli and the vanilla cream and the pluto potion as a sampler the best one, " can I have a sample of the blue oil if I buy the blue oil?"
It is funny as i write this but at that moment, I got ruffled..not mad but for sure like, okay, I deal with this all day at my job with customers who want to return a shea butter with one fuking swipe in it..whores!
lol again
I think she was so excited about the products that I may have misunderstood her enthusiasm for cheapness. I am not perfect you know. But if you cheapen me, I get frosty. I am worth more that 13 bucks and so are you babies! Ask for more!
I want 13 thousand!
ha ha ha

Monday, May 8, 2017

I am still here

I think about you every day. You the ones who love my soap and my words and what ever else you love about me me

I work at 5 am now at my job most days and so my body had to adjust to the 3:30 am wake up time in order to recover from the last day where I worked my ass off and pounded about 5 to 10 miles depending and maybe a few up and downs to upstairs.
"yes, we all know I work hard" I am saying to you..
 I think I am more calm about it now and so a little more suave about myself and what I am required of at my job, at home and maybe with a man..I am not sure.I am fine either way, honestly. devotion to one's family leaves little
room for trifles and I am not talking cakes here, although that does sound lovely. With fresh straberries.:)
Some have been persistent enough..look once you engage with some one, is it about understanding their shit and I am tired. It is like you feel their pain and I am in enough of body hurts yo! lol
When you engage with someone they may tell you of their pain and more. They need to share, we all want the comfort when someone actually cares about us. Be aware of moods  in your chosen company. They may rob you of your good thoughts. Be honest and caring as much as you can. and, and, it may be your cologne making you depressed. Use essential oils and not perfume from the store. And don't spray that fake stuff on yourself, it is poison. what the heck?

Instead use an oil mixed beautifully by well seasoned clean hands, anointed by these same oils for many many moons and ready to make your skin feel like it is glorious.

I am mixing a nice little body  butter for summer today.

Shea butter, tonka butter, vanilla co2 total by ananda apothecary at 12% vanillin, sandalwood and patchouli, also a drop tobacco and to loosen things up, I will add just enough prikly pear oil to make it like silk.
I wore this all day yesterday and yes, my ideas rose to the surface. I find that when I wear sandalwood I get more money and more money means more oils as I am so generous to the product. It is everything and always has been. Why stop now?

Saturday, April 22, 2017

hello babies and big giant sunshine

In a near by town here in the Detroit area, there community of highly religious Muslims that  hired a crooked doctor lady lady lady lady..woman, sister, mom, I am sure she is a mom too, to perform female genital mutilation on young girls, seven years old... well, they tell the girls that everyone gets this done and they must do it. Normal and horrid in modern times , wouldn't you say?
We we have done it to boys too since the dawn of what men in robes in the heat with no books and no idea about atoms, decided that this is the way to treat babies. Seven year old girls! Oh? And three day old baby boys are not that shocking?

And now to the serious and meditative part of my story..
It is cold here and it is becoming a nice day after all. Every day the sun is more and more brillant. I love this time of year.

Now to even more serious stuff to think about..

"I enjoy our conversations. Your cologne is too much on my delicate sandalwood, How about some sandalwood  for you with a fine patchouli?"

I should I say that. How can someone who knows me want to wear some fucking thing with some fucking sharp chemical they pretend is citrus or amber or ambre or noir or Tom Ford with his over the top ingredients..some really good and then he gives you brain chem log syndrome (made up word))?
I am greedy for the best things which means real oils any thing  else is out of the consideration.
It is crazy and so evil to each other and the rest of humanity. It represents a falseness and pretending where what is fashionable is presented by one small group and people just flock. The boots with the tights..missy, you have not seen a horse in like ever in real life. ha ha ha I don't care is ts only poignant because I see so many people all day and there is a look at the market.

My look is natural and I am a crone
I look to have accomplished my mindful goals
my reasons for living
my gratitude and joys
my riches beyond my requests
I can relax now with a notion that I know know know what I want
It is comfort
good food
great family
the fuks
I love them all so much
guess what, they smell the way I want.
real real real
really good.

Thank you I love you for not smelling fake and horrid..thank you mom for not cutting my vagina and dad for busting your ass for  mom, She is the queen of our home for sure.

 I want that which I already have. I have so much and more is coming.

Wednesday, April 19, 2017

happy and safe

I have had less and less  to rave about for about a month now. I have  been reading and digging dirts.
ha ha

I made some nice things though. Rose Cardamom Soap  turned out so nice, I sold every one of those. When I am good I am very good. I rove a rose with labdanum too!

I have been very thoughtful of you. Of all the things we have been through together and how it can be years since we have spoken and when we do, it is like yesterday. We are drawn together though a silent web of ideas and thoughts and intended invitations.
I love you and the way  you get me and when I say that I mean some want to get me so I can hear them out and l listen to how they suffer. ha ha and I mean to kind of chuckle here..
Don't forget how we all suffer the same but in our minds we have more sadness and sorrow than others unless you see the others suffering, the real suffering.
Not why the traffic is bad or the boyfriend is a jerk.
The  ones who have pain and loss, hunger and bloodshed..everyday and every hour on earth the violence continues and here right now we are gratefully safe and well fed and so so so happy.

Today I will prepare and amazing meal and a nice new batch of soap or two. I once made a soap with ground nettles and I think it will be a nice one should I maybe choose  to make Nettles and Moss.
You see, I have been pondering on this new very funky lavender oil from France. it is odd and I love it!
Why soap with nettles? Nettles are rich in chlorophyll, silicates and other very health nutrients. It is nice and smoothing on the skin.

I have been getting many requests for more scrubby soap.

Lime Vetiver Afternoon Special..

Lemon OG
Blood Orange

One big hunkin' body bar and an oil..mmmm
It will come with a vial of oil
so very soothing, soft
and oddly lingering with a sweet tangy finish from the vetiver having blended like velvet with the lime.

I hope you have a wonderful day and think of me with laughter and awesomeness!

Monday, April 17, 2017

mending the fences and letting some go

It has been a working time and cleaning up for spring and summer rains to bring more flowers. I love it.
forget me nots
black eyed susan
I have planted seeds and I am stacking the plantings by two weeks in order to stack the harvest times. Last year, I composted a ton of them and that is okay because good dirt!

There are so many varieties that I might have bushels of tomatoes :):)
Greek varieties and big giant heirlooms like "hillbilly reds"
I have an hearty Siberian tomato. I planted brandy wine (pink) and all the black tomato varies I could find.
I planted the basils by the softest part of last year's compost  where they will be free to get as big as they want.
This week I will plant onions and enough so that we can have fresh salad by June..yea..I planted lettuce, it never does well for me..maybe this year it will be different.
I must say it is so magical to work with the soil. My mom says my soil is beautiful and I might agree. I am in awe of seeds though. I started the tomatoes indoors and they hated it. They popped out all right but nope, not enough light. we tried a strand of LED lights and $20.00 later.."okay let us put them outside."
It gets cold at night. They are still alive in their little green house. I do talk to them every day.

I planted all kinds of quash and pumpkin. I am hopping they wander any where they please. Pumpkin Pie is delicious. Ravioli with a simple  pumpkin filling made with just enough good goat cheese, its lovely, delicate and pleasant in your mouth. I want some right now made with a pasta rich in eggs. mm
I will also plant water melon and I will let them thrive in the sunniest spot of the place.
The vines are to me, just the best. I ordered a Japanese squash  variety which I might just put at the beginning of the place and let it just hang its fruit like little orange lanterns.

you are my orange lantern
you brighten my day the way  you attend to your tasks
you lighten my heart the way you look at me with knowing eyes
my knowing heart
my gut wrenching mamma mind ready to
break up
smooth out the dirt
pick out the bad parts
they come out of everywhere
repair your boundaries
build them with core  strength
with core control
with mindful memories
mindful trust
it's everything we like god to be
it is us together though  as one mind working some big giant fire pit so hot and so deep and so much stuff it continues to spew out that it is black and still not it that the layers are so wide in between..there is an ice cold void made of some thing, unknown dark matter dark energy us.. only 1% of everything. We think we are so much, so important, because we know about us, as far as we know now..and it is a lot and not that much in time. 99% of everything that lived on earth has died off and they lived for long periods of time here. We as humans have evolved to now in just about a couple of million years..
from a little rat like creature to a naked ape..the bones tell a story.

What is going to be your story? My story? I am telling it now and maybe I will tell more and maybe less.
Sometimes I remember vividly things I should forget.:)

Friday, April 7, 2017


I see the moon and the moon sees me
I hear her voice of eternity
her luminous rays reflecting silent truths
desires met with little force
riches had and lost just the same
what is her time but an eternal game
she makes us play
while we carry on and while away
the hours during each new day she brings

happy spring

Thursday, April 6, 2017

bubble bubble toil and win

don't say trouble say let us see when
say you are  fine and finer still
is the way you take care if yourself and your will
the way other people remember you
I hope some of your *swords just swiped by some of the times
it is about being an idiot I know
it is about cringing and laughter in the memories blow so quick so sorrow full
it does not matter still
resentments are bad on the *gall bladder anyhow:)
and who needs that business

**gall, as to something that you can be sickened by or hate on

karma and witches

It is not karma I fear but my dishwasher breaking down and if you tell me we are meant to be together it is because I  want it that way. How come some things are meant to be and the bad ones are never "oh, I know we are meant to be that is why we know each other."?
People say it all day and it pauses me to think on it.
Are we really? Or are we drawn to situations based on our desires and activities to get what we want?
I know, it is hard to think on it but it is true. What we do from here on is what matters not what we used to do.

The thing with witches that I can not abide is the pretending we are these long haired beautiful nymphs on a mountain with the wind  in our hair and our inner power strong like fire raging towards the sky..I love it and it is not real.
I wish the man did not label us so. We are strong only because we birth and heal our children and our generations continues. We are really strong in that. We carry the burdens of men who bring blood shed and grief. Men, who must control the money, the wars and the the roads.We have women who build on that in order to fit in the manly structures and in that women have been indoctrinated not to say what is the most obvious things..I will
I will
I will
The real power with in is our will. The way we manipulate and exceed in our own expectations..right?
I can not just take it and say nothing.
It is not because I am an atheist now..I think I am and I  know for sure it is okay because I can integrate my knowledge to make the best choices, for me and my kin.

sigh..the suffering of boys dancing for dirty men holding their dicks! Yes it does does and those are the men worthy of being in the temples! I mean really! And we all say that every one is equal but really fear for our lives is why we comply.
The  way we make women in to sex objects in every advertisement..yea, we do. and no one really looks like that. No one. I can always see beyond the plastic boobs and can't hide from the sun babies..the light of day shine on your true faces..our true faces.

Speaking of which witch which..
I am right now bathed in eternal scent of rose choya and burnt oranges..I am safe. I hope you are too.
I love you!

Thursday, March 30, 2017

aromatherapy times of year and how we change without even knowing

I hope we are all intending to be smart about it.
I hope we can look to the future now and smile a little.
It is hard. It has been a really emotional year for many people.
Everyone's true colors came out in a way didn't they?

Let me tell you a little story about a gal named ann
they told to call herself that because her whole name was not american enough.
They told her the words to say and the clothes to wear and she tried to find her path out of nowhere to somewhere. They tried to mold her in their hate
they tried
they tried to lie and make her recite creeds
they tried
They thought they could preserve the old ways if they tried hard enough, they can never do that because of evolution..

When my great grandfather came to this land in 1913 he was alone. There were some friends here to greet him maybe and maybe not. They gave him work in a diner and he worked and worked and saved money to bring his family here. some came in rags with no money and a few grains of seeds they smuggled in because they treasured their seeds and their foods. they brought us their food and still can except nowadays we only want their food and not them. We only  want to uncover their women and kill their men. 

Vengeance on Midian
17"Now therefore, kill every male among the little ones, and kill every woman who has known man intimately. 18"But all the girls who have not known man intimately, spare for yourselves. 19"And you, camp outside the camp seven days; whoever has killed any person and whoever has touched any slain, purify yourselves, you and your captives, on the third day and on the seventh day.…numbers 31:18

And you are telling me being a feminist is evil? Really?

It is always as before, men fighting men and teaching women to be wretched to other women.
Is it really a sisterhood then? It can be, it can be an humankind and  not some new group to fight an old group.
I am  a feminist and I am a raging whore and old whore because the whore, she has had to fight, she has been beaten and worked to the bone, she has created beauty in many forms..many many smelly forms....Be  not a killer but a fighter with more and more desire, fervor, mindfulness and glory of being..

clean life
wonderful smart smart smart think
self aware think
kindness think

Saturday, March 25, 2017

oh thank goodness

I started messing with the new blogger themes and got all messed up.
I couldn't even go to my own menu and then I had to go be off so I left it. That garish orange, yuk!
I made it a plain background again  that I can read so it is going to stay this way for a while unless I let that Iranian Greek guy who wants  to come here and fix things more classy for us. He thinks I am smart enough to hang out..
Well his hair is a little too combed for me isn't it!! and
I hate cologne on a man, on most men.. I want a man to smell like me because
lol Maybe I am already feeling vibes like he will fix my computer needs and then be like all I like you so..maybe I am too defensive about who I share my sacred gardens with..yea?
Everyone has an opinion about where I should take this business.
I do not know myself.
I actually meet many local gals who have brought their soap in whole foods and really admire their products and success and one or two times I will  share about how I make soap and it is more I would say, high caliber..she was so nice with her really discerning eyes..Taurus..they are super smart.
"how do you do it so perfect and exact every time?", I asked her one day a long time later.
"well, I don't waste money one extreme oils and expensive blends for one ting!"
Ouch! I got poked! ha ha I smiled.:) "silly duck!" I said to myself!
She is has to make a recipe and do it the same way every time to have a product one can make 200 bars of..every time every day..
The fat ratio is one thing I stick to..the essential oils, no, Boring right? I am a soap chef! My ideas flow like the special and exquisite delights you will feel when you unwrap a new bar of deliciousness.
I have made 200 bars of soap a day in a past life..yes I have. Even then, I had the menu and then my deviations in to skin care gave me a respite. remember fire soap? mm
My brain can't do that. I am so sorry, but I do not think by myself, I can muster up 200 bars a day and unless it  explodes so much on line through some medium which totally comes as a surprise..well, maybe, I would include one or two of my boys. Things would change for sure.
Things will only go in the direction I intend them and work for.

It is not a bad thing to make a basic line for every one.
I feel our (our) products are not for everyone.

 As the earth is right now spinning around the sun, the sun is also spinning hard and spinning around this giant magnetic disk of stuff and things and other stars and other rock planets with creatures..which we re all passing places we are not even remotely aware of.
This to me is the possibilities of everything being available. Focus and understanding..yea..

in that whole scheme it does not matter our opinions, or our successes..because at any given moment it can all be over and has been over and over many many times. Mostly though and right now it is not over. Our star is just fine. Humans will always flock to each other, and I invite the mind of a woman, the mind of a man who breeds love, kindness, learning, teaching and all that stuff that actually makes us special in our own vast yet light sphere of eternal being.

I am reading Siddhartha..I have many thoughts...


 Soap Menu for the week,

Blood Orange Clove Soap

Gritty City with clay and raspberry seeds
red mandarin oil

 Lavender with aztec clay and seaweed grit

Wednesday, March 22, 2017

Happy Spring my goddesses and gods

Everything is slowly waking up for real now and it is like when you push snooze and sleep so deeply for another 30 minutes and then you realize, "yup, morning!"
My last dream was me baking loaves of bread in a big wood fired oven and having to burn them because of zombies..ha ha ha
I know what it represents and it drives me crazy why my mind is making things up that make no sense and yet..
It is all about letting go and getting rid of the people who drain you.
They want to drain you because that is all they know how to do. It takes skill too so you have to never relax and never be lax because they creep in and try to get in to your brain..
they feel it takes away from the pain of knowing what they are and what their innuendos mean.
 It happens and we all don't even notice. Our own innuendos fly around like invisible notions..they are real and have matter and travel without us noticing..
I digress...again:)
 Now, sing!!
"Know your own innuendos and arrange them in good order so that you are not an angry cunt all day..
good to know.."

I have a shit ton of great seeds this year and I am going to plant each and every one of them and it is gonna be so fun..and so beautiful!

Oils..yes..I have some nice oils right now and the products reflect that.Seems like March is quiet always and even is cool, because germination does not just happen in dirt. my brain is sizzling  with more ideas and even extreme notions..always.

 Burning my bread loaves in my dream. It was an act of protection for my family in some way. I had a long steel staff which I buried all the loaves in the fire to make more heat and coal and then at the same time I was giving orders as to the next thing to do. My hair was long as if in a past life.
I want the oven man! I fucking want it! I want a nice one and not some ugly thing..bricks and style and pizza..what?
Even soap makers eat!
spicy veg

savarin with ginger and blood orange

delicious vetiver soap

Friday, March 17, 2017

The Mars The Movements

I hope we can all be over all of our shake ups the last six months. I realized I am emotional and irrational at times yet I do notice when things are crazy and what I have to do as to what I want to do.

What I want is a ten to four..or six..we will see. the building I have been passing since Costa Rica ten years ago is now for sale..
I mean what  am I thinking?
So what if I think about what should happen and what steps need taken to reach my desired conclusions and of course things don't always go the way you planned. They won't so get that clear right there.
I am right now working for a corporation that is quickly building itself up to be a bigger corporation and man, I am tired.
How many more years I will pound that pavement, I do not know, but I just again, bought shoes that I will wear out in 4 to 6 months.
We do on average six to ten miles a day where I yea, I cry when some jerk of a woman is a cruel dick to me..I am a nerd and put art in to my hands to serve you and you are mad..
It is so funny really. :)
Moving on then...:) I have been hurt before by people that said they love me..rawerrr:) who are these clowns?

I have in my painful crying and longing for oils made some very delicious soap nuggets. I am using a new technique in  some bars that will reflect this. The rose cardamom soap is one..Vetiver is an other one. they turned out good. really good.
rose cardamom soap

To me, soap is art. It is the fat of the land and the fat I love to use to make everyone happy.
Organic coconut is oil wonderful and sustainable. What else is there to say except let us make a cake. Yes, let us make a cake and then eat some while we wait for our soap to cure.

What a wonderful beginning for our new phase of life. It is a beginning of sorts. I think one way to deal with this is of course of course try to do your best and as always say you are sorry for making dumb mistakes. Walk away from a fight..I know I talk big, but I never want to strike someone..honestly.
We must remain gracious and some loose their cool and freak out over the boss of the day..he is just a boss who at the end of the day probably has digestive issues..ha hahaaa most people do and  then they come to me and cry and want to talk about eating essential oils and then they freak out and call corporate and tell them oh, "they" told me to eat this lemon oil and you are not supposed to eat it. I want the one you can goes on like this all day. It becomes pedestrian and sort of insidious too. The companies do it and people buy it up like ants drawn to the house with them most crumbs, which is mine.
"yes, let me go  get that special lemon oil that says you can eat it so now you can eat this special lemon oil, because it is food based from special lemon trees"
Thanks fucking Young Living!
One lady from  another brand came in one time stenching like cigarettes and talking about the healing effects of their edible oils, food grade and organic and 90 dollars for 15 mls of frankincense.
"stenching of gross tobacco and now you are like telling what is good for me?" I thought!
I snapped at her and said that it is ridiculous and dangerous to speak that way about oils. They are not a commodity (think again). I felt like they were trying to take one of my children to undress and send them to be strippers in the dirtiest crack house. Like casting pearls to swine and like putting down a red velvet pillow in the mud where everyone tramples.
that was years ago now.
I have relaxed about eating oils a bit. I will use a drop lemon in my sugar syrup. I always have. I never one time schemed to sell edible oils. One drop boiled out. Not ten drops in lemonade every day! I mean seriously. Then again, out of every 100 people maybe one will actually love the oils and take good care of them. It would be nice.
People are extreme. They love to copy. Which is why I am re learning my skill right now. Which is why I will count each step. I will copy from  masters and I will  to be better organised and weigh and measure more thoroughly and I will have become more focused than ever before.

I will

You will

Monday, March 13, 2017

full moon gladness mixed with tears

It is cold and icy and yesterday, a lady was so mean to me it gave me anxiety and i was like, "wtf?' to myself all day. It hurt me to the core. I do not know why I am so sensitive like this! She was one of a thousand people I see weekly, no faced almost. She was a blond I remember that.
I am so dumb and also I took a brilliant day for granted, on automatic I suppose. and in less that a minute..some shit went down!
"do you have pink salt?'
Me, "oh yes we have Himalayan and Redmond pink from out west"
"NO, not that Himalayan, the pickling salt!"
"oh, sodium nitrate, no that is poison I said automatically,

" she got mad, it was a split second of crazy intense mad too..
"I did not come here to argue!!"
"I am sorry", I whispered and walked away, "oh shit storm!"
five minutes later....
She found it necessary to come between my three customers who were waiting to speak with me, she found it then a real big deal that she yell at me in the whole place about how rude I was and I should have only said "we don 't have it" not any extra info..

rawerrr and lol...

I did not know what do so I said "I am sorry and walked away, figuring, she would let it be or not..then I would have to call the is never good..and she did leave! I got all shook up! One tear came out of my eye!

I am not rude, grow up and I will say something is dangerous when it is. It is dangerous and she may always get these kind of responses because well, she is behind the times, mad that she does not want to change, and perhaps she has had to deal with such reactions on a daily basis and is always in an "argument" with someone at any time. I can see her point. I can.

um, if you don't want to argue, go to google, go to amazon go to a deli that makes cured meat..and order your powder..jeez!


I was the one who was open to a response because it was the numbers..and the right time before our encounter. I found it odd that level of control and retreat i had to endure and not fight her right there..I can't..that is why I am a zen warrior and I do not have to kill her..unless she comes at me with force then I would taker her down as I learned for years to do and speak a whisper in her ear and tell her that I expect more from a lady. and sodium nitrate is poison..are you kidding me right now?

I came home and made soup and took a hot shower with the old whore. I forget sometimes how she covers you in luxurious soothing patchouli vetiver goodness and hidden deep inside are the strengths we have to pull daily, the control, the weird interactions and reaction we give. to each other.
Not everyone is your friend, very few in fact..think about what is important..:):me:) and you(:

Saturday, March 11, 2017

here I am

How do you do..

We have cocoa butter at the store now. people will eat that. How crazy! At least it is organic.
I just want to rub it on my body. Black seed oil any one?
I hear it cures cancer.
yea right, just like angels hover over you and call  you Eddy!
ha :)
Yes, take it if you want but knowing me, I would rather put it on my skin. I did go through a love affair with black seed oil a little while ago. I put it in a charcoal based cleanser with rose and myrrh.
Mirror of Isis Cleanser and then the name isis became famous for other reasons I would rather not be acquainted with.
Black seed oil was in one of my health aging serums in the beginning. I loved it and then it turned heavy like sediment, like pumpkin seed oil or tamanu..I mean not on the face. I used it up and have not regretted doing that. A face serum should be light and enter the skin and feel happy and soothing. One should not cringe at a strong odor of omegas in the nut seeds. Black Seed Oil..
I mean, is stinky and well, I have learned that too much money spent on the fray can lead to money wasted.
It is all about the money in everything isn't it?
Just to make a serum is expensive once you get the oils together.

I am kind of excited about prickly pear seed oil.
I bought a little bit from eden and it is lovely.
I will buy more of that one.

I mixed

10 mls prickly pear
1 ounce organic jojoba
1 ounce organic argan oil
1 ounce marula
1 ounce rose hip seed oil ( you can use less as some of them have a strong odor. I use Trilogy from New Zealand)
add essential oils
I like sandalwood at the moment with vetiver so you know..:)


Friday, March 10, 2017

More sage and lavender more old whore and more better life

They are are so special. I love making them. All the soaps, I fall in love with them. Some right away like that one guy that dove in and kissed me in the first five minutes of our acquaintance. :) Some are are a little bit too much and you have to take a time or two to nurture and develop with. Like good friends do.

It becomes a ritual because after all these years I really do best in quietude and solo work.
I recently did a very expensive project for a girl who throws money at me. It still had to be something I love. I have to live with it and focus on and harbor its development..
I get so nervous and spend too much money and then what I do with that is really right. It is my hope,

You get your soap stuff together (:mise en place..:)you line up your ingredients as to not miss a thing. You have planned and planned for weeks on just the right amount of oils to suit this recipe. What else is there? Throw it all together and sniff and stir and smile on top of the soap cream.

I have added so much myrrh and vetiver to one such soap mixture that I cried when it was over. I have been crying the whole time. Myrrh can do that to you. Your compassion levels become high and you get to see things from a mothering aspect rather than in anger over some jealousies and rants. People! They suffer and you get to to cry with them sometimes. Read "me before you" the book not the movie.
You will cry and cry hard.

Spring is up on us and I aim to titillate with ideas which I hope will inspire you to great thoughts and silly laughter.
The next six weeks will be intense and you a chance to add new skills to your wagon of confidence goodies. you carry that with you so it might as well be  easy. Make sure all your tools are well taken care of and your hard work will show.
Lower types will want to fight and carry on and suffer with their own made misfortunes..yea. Some will cry and the smart ones will learn and live to see another day.

It is so cold today but I feel spring anyhow. The sun will shine and the birds will sing. It is gonna happen!

Tuesday, March 7, 2017

I have been busy and..haven't had much to say except that I hope everything is going your way

I am busy these days too. It seems like spring break can't comes fast enough..and then what, it'll come, it'll go and every moment doesn't count as much as you want it to.
I wish I could just spew thing to keep you entertained so you can always think I'm special. I am not special..just a nerd a tired nerd..ha haha

I took the whole day off yesterday not because I wanted to. I had to. Working retail kicks my but. Sundays can be a killer with many people in my face :) all day.
I am gracious. I walked a shit ton and I basically tried to get up and move but instead slept all day. All day..I ate and slept. I ate a cake I made the day before and threw it out because no, it sucked..
I am learning proper home baking. Next will be puff pastry. I have never done correctly and it must happen.
Even when I sleep all day, I cook. Nerd.

This week I begin a new schedule and so shipping days may change..I do not think so.

Have a wonderful day, I am off to count things and be happy as a woman, mother, soap maker bitch.. oh, I love you!

Sunday, March 5, 2017

thoughts about things and stuff on a wintry day in march cold and sunny

Cold and sunny and birthing something new as
the excitement tickles as you brew and coo, fanning your best thoughts.

As you think about what people say and what people do to each other and see their hurt and how they meet their challenges daily. It is mind boggling to me how complicated we can make our lives. It is our adrenals that keep us on our toes and take us to irreparable places. It is our mindfulness that keeps us in control to be able to handle the things. It is what it is good for. Our mind that knows what is best, we can be trained by our inner mind! Ha!

I feel strong
and really grateful

I am mostly content as a person. Not really. Not every minute.

I got really mad this week because one of my boys took a le cruset and did a stir fry in it and well, it is still soaking as I daily rub it with salt to get it to go clean..I say things..

"hey, I leave my pristine kitchen and you guys leave twenty cups on the counter and now you are making potatoes with out cleaning up first and also using an improper  pan to make them??"
"Like WTF!!"

"You never taught us"

Well, there is a dirty excuse I tell ya!

"hey mom, you want to hear a guitar riff I made up?"


Life is like this, and we are always reviewing our behaviors..we are, shouldn't we?

" Cooking is art and we need to all cook more. Clean up, you can't leave you plates all over the place, what am I running here, some frat house!?"

I would rather cook alone I  think then teach, and some us are like that. I think it is time I became more direct about kitchen rules..

Welcome, to anastasia'a sweet love cafe :)

open 10 to 4

skin care


Tuesday, February 28, 2017

lana del rey witches and casting spells

 I mean really!
Once you start hexing you put yourself in the wicked witch category and we are not wicked.
We who have been
put aside
cast away
tortured for sex
and for what?
Looking at other more practical and healing ways to fix things, make them better make them habitable..beautiful, creative, hard working.
Now we are hexing? For politics?

I know it is hard to understand but  had we witches, had we metaphysical powers, wouldn't  we  have chosen not being killed horribly in this meat suit?
Had we those kind of powers?

Instead we have snuck around and still made things medicines which to this day are all earth harvested and then refined and then loaded with what ever chemical Men  had in mind. But we stay together, we want healing and meaning to our good lives. We brought our children up safely until they themselves go out and produce for themselves, sometimes our sons were soft and sweet until they grew up and went away to kill for the king and we stayed home and cried as if the world was torn apart. Or like when we found out the the whole virgin thing  is preposterous and gently prodded and poked to say that is is silly.  I wish we did that  right from the beginning! I wish we secretly told our daughters and sons, that was a lie, right from the start I wish we did.  Moses wrote after he died because the language structures we not that ancient as to hear God tallking.. but I  digress..he said "thou shall not suffer a witch to live"
It is is the very first thing that guy wrote who ever he was.. One of his wives surely had had  to cure some cough or something for the kids and what, You are going to kill her because she is worshiping another the one that rules over clovers or frankincense??
Sneaking around in forests like they show in the paintings of naked women it is the worst evil thing to some men and even women to this day!
I mean people are getting their heads cut off and you are worried that women are worshiping satan (your demi god) or fairies or any other thing than that killing angry god you are so afraid of would hate? It is silly and childish, really.

Now we have hexing!

Your power (power) is only for you..if you use it to hurt it takes away
if you use it for good it it can span to father away with golden and radiant vibes
if you use it for protection..good luck
You are only as protected as the amount of money you have right now and how safe you are from jackals..and far away and self sustained you are from the city.
Even in the most remote places you will need rice and wheat..something to make your belly happy.
If you really want to help, go and read other books be free from old world restraints and tell your children to be strong and smart and sometimes to stay quiet, stealthy and looking at the future self.

Thursday, February 23, 2017

dragon's blood balm

2 ounces dragon's blood resin
2 ounces Yemeni frankincense
ground in mortar and pestle till smooth and powdered
pour in to bees wax and olive oil which you could make a balm with..
melt them all together till you get a syrup to the liquid state but once in air goes oily solid. that is perfect because you want that for a long time in hot water..let them day add,

choya loban
pine white
palo santo

red hot babe

hold hot for hours in hot water bath..

be free from restraints
be honest with yourself
don't believe your  own lies or others seemingly calm demeanor.
The red balm will be ready in a couple of days..I might even buy tins. I do not always like tins so I must calm down and brew my brew up..our brew.

I want the red hot smoke that comes from choya and dragon's blood. I want  the vetiver to linger on the skin having married with the incense and amber tones.


Wednesday, February 22, 2017

me and kyphi go way way back

and no I won't just yet, start singing 'walk like an Egyptian" :)

I am working on a scent own rendition. I looked on the web and read about Justine Crane's version which has been well thought out and she went further to make incense which is divine.
 I read about some of the others who I really don't know if I can trust.
Some like to write witchy names in order o invoke a certain message in order to sell their wares.

We had a run on some fake amber thing that lasted about three months at my store and has dwindled to a few who really enjoy the animal scent the Indian company as perverted in an amber like horror. I can smell it and it is sick enough not to go back for more. Who am I an emperor of scent? Ha:)
My black witch love, I call her that because I love her dearly and I feel like my mom, she is someone I can trust and I know no matter what, she will slice through any bullshit which I love more. Even if it is mine.
Maybe that is why my soap shop is so special. We are all sort of seeking kindness and peace of and a feeling of joyful wonder at such simple beautiful plants that give us so much?

My kyphi so far is brewing very nicely. I added mastic today and it changed everything. I added more myrrh because it is what I feel is the main ingredient beside frankincense. I am sure the ancients  used what was easily bought or traded and can you imagine how much gum and resin they must have collected in ancient times when the demand was not as high as today?
 Even twenty years ago I had chunk of myrrh as big as my I am happy with chunk as big as my thumb..very happy indeed.

I will not likely make incense because Justine makes super fine incense and I can't do everything all at once anyhow..
A little kyphi spray though, might be nice for all of us..yes?
kyphi spray

Thursday, February 16, 2017

hello from wonderwinter land

It is cold and snowing of course because it is still winter. There is hope and the season comes which will be awesome spring time..for now we wait. We must.

Wait for what?
 It could be a development you have been working on for years now..four years now..ha
Yes you have. You dove deeply, learned, became more detached about outcomes and you thrived to this point. You have survived and it looks good on you. You hung out with people smarter than you, you read books, you made good food and delicious skin care..I say baby, what else is there?
A Springtime Fougere'?

Wait for what?
Well, sometimes when there is all out war among the masses who can't decide between hating the king or drinking gallons of black seed oil because it cures cancer brings your long lost love back, gives you 27 thousand dollars in your pocket, in the seed oil business's bank account like every 30 seconds for about 4 months or so..we will see how long this lasts and it is not really my point..that is..all because why? Some dumb ass started spewing miracles and they all love it..the miracle, the cure, the revelation which always turns out to be nothing biggie and they still have to work for their lives and things are still what they are because of each thought and each effort.

Believe me, some people kiss the dirt right now. They are down and crying. Guess what, the strong survive and the ones who spend too much time crying, are not making and doing and working and singing, and talking and breaking it down. Everyone will have get up and change, they have to change or they end up like Pete (the dick who beat his wife) on the walking dead, their face shot up and nothing left..(it is a metaphor for a hateful face in this sense)
I see it all day. Smile in to yourself and it will show outwards.
I find that singing is helpful.

Wednesday, February 15, 2017

am i blue

yes I am blue with rich abundant always honest thoughts
am I blue over you
you  you you
yes, because you ripped my heart open and left it there after you saw it was not white enough
yes, because you didn't turn out to be the man I dreamed you were as I lied to myself to support the bigger lies
as I cried to my self as I watched you wither in to a shell of a scholar or a :)nything worthy of a respectful holler
am I blue over the failed experiments that left me bereft for loosing hundreds of dollars of oils
am I blue over that so much..
I should be
not as much though

am I blue over your unkind words when I wasn't there to defend myself
a little because the lie was that you are more important for that moment

am I blue ho ho ho ho
Am I blue that earth is ragged with chemical bombs so fat men can talk on the phone and hold their balls..
it is a thing to make on ponder on what is important

Am I blue then?

I am happy
I am free
no restraints to cause me worry of persecution
'or hate
no restraints
none to be had
what should i do now but be super glad

I am free to say and do the right thing
my thing that is right
What should it be this time? Am I to dream of it tonight?
I may already have and like a light wave it takes a while to come to me in a real setting, come totally to light..

I will make it so. I always begin with new moon and and imbog for the year because I still respect all the sacred times our star enlightens us, feeds us, makes us grow,, makes plasma which is everything we are..I love when he peeks out of the horizon and stays there like my star to be always depended on to be brightly making me happen..
Am I blue?
Only because
tanzy and yarrow and the chamo blue..oh yea....

blue heaven gelee'

I am more conservative than you are

I cook and make soap and nurture..and yet, you,still think I am a "goddamn liberal"? I make a garden and feed all my kin and talk...