Wednesday, August 31, 2016

is it mercury? yes! Are we okay now? Yes!

Wake up and live the real life you , you, you believe in some fuking template set forth by your parents as an ultimatum! That is what the Gods want,! You know, the ones that  rule your decisions and everything you  could possibly think about or do and you pray and beg and pray and chant to and pretend you know them. You say, "praise him" like a drug after you take a bunch of
who am I a fuking judger? I won't!

You do not have to follow a template of what life should be based on robe wearing underwearless men with beards! I am just saying and that I love you.
Have your memories, be afraid and do what is real for you not some sudden little box with with all the answers.
I am ranting to me, I am ranting to all of you who think that you have to lie and beg your parents for love and cherish based on how many times you prayed your Hail Mary or how many times you said I am a republican..fuk off, some of us have brown skin, we are fine. read more, listen, be yourself, live the life you believe in and carry on because you is a long song..

life's a long song Jethro Tull

Also the sign of a good parent is how many times your kids say the love you not the secrets they keep from you so that you are not insulted by their behavior. However shocking, or out of the proverbial box. I am stunned that parents won't speak to their kids if they break the rules.."the rules" "The Rules"

Oh and speaking of Mary and her child was she so surprised to find him in the temple at age 12, stunned she was? She sure forgot that angel who impregnated her and the big star and all the good and frankincense about her divine son and yet..she was stunned at what he knew and the way he spoke to the rabbis about the law.."the law" "The Law"..
Always with the law. "Can't we all just grow some grain instead of wandering through the desert?"
"No, let us create a few different tribes in the desert and make up a story about being slaves to Egypt."
"But 40 years is a little long, don't you think?"
"It is written by God, we do it!"

ha ha ha ha ha ha

Tuesday, August 30, 2016

The day Rick got trimmed by his son Walking Dead and Rick

Do you remember when Carl was so pissed at Rick and he just told him.
"if you'd have done..none of those people would be dead.."
It was easy for him to say. He is lucky his dad was there the whole time, just being surprised by danger beyond what anyone really can endure!
Also, Rick took that to heart and listened where if my kid spoke that way I'd be crushed..oh, wait, I have gone through that harassment with my kids already. I mean just because it is a zombie apocalypse, doesn't mean a teen doesn't have to go through being a teenager. lol
Little bitch, Carl, I'd slap that attitude right off and give you a what for!

season 3/16
It  was one of my favorite episodes of all time, when Rick, totally shed the fear and his attachment to all who died before him. He let it go, he bonded with Michone and he listed to Michone, Hershel and pain brought all that.
Suffering, fear and anxiety and all the shit we make for ourselves during our own zombie apocalypse..our bad thoughts, our selfish expectations...

Now, my little rant..:)
What a word. Did you know that since the beginning of our time and communicators and aware of ourselves beings, that we have had and impending apocalypse? Truth!
Some stories lead to rapture, some to everlasting suffering..
Let us notice how we carry on and kill each other now..
Some say, if we went all vegetarian that we would be calmer and less likely to kill each other.
I say look at India and all the turmoil over who gets to eat what and how people die for eating a food. Vegetarians can kill as easily as meat eaters. they will be nice to an animal and hate
I don't care.
I told this one guy who was all in my face because NOW he quit smoking after years of it and is eating bails of salad and he feels his blood sugar is better as a result. "Nice."
I told him.
"it is a better picture that those slabs of meat you post on the instagram"
"do not put your morality on me boy, I do not accept your judgement of my diet!
He smiled and got it I hope.
Look, I eat chicken and fish. My body does not do well on just vegetarian or vegan or completely raw, I do eat a who slew of fresh food that I make. I do not have those kinds of concerns..
The whole thing with the end of the world though..
see I get side tacked because everything goes to death and being accepted in the afterlife.

A real apocalypse will be like The Walking Dead. Ragged, starving hungry violent people who have less brain and that will make them do stupid things like kill people for a kidney for money and kill their neighbor because he is brown or too white..

The whole idea is clear in any event, Rick thought things through and made a decision to live an honest life where we accept strangers and give them hope. We listen to our family and our team mates, they are one of us. We do not allow violence tho.
We do not torture, or carry on. These are things that keep us down and the big lie is so big that you are in it and you can not see it. You do not have to defend what you know or the gods, you do not have to defend them. Live a good life now, so you do not have to remember what you said and what you did.

What is the big lie?
There is no crane in the sky that is going to help you. Turn to your family and bring it all in, tight and ready for anything through education, open mind, active mind, clean home, words that flow, grow some food
be one with the stars at night, they are our true brothers. We are one, I know this, so then why all the amazement at how all humans perish?
Why so much zombie love.
Well, Andrew Lincoln is why. Good acting, yes a little over the top with the crying, but that is why. He carries that show, or did carry. i am not sure about Jeffery Dean Morgan coming on. I think it will be  good to see them at odds though. Rick always goes a little crazy before he strikes like a snake coiled. The kundalini is strong in that one!

Saturday, August 27, 2016

more god dammed slut shaming

amber rose kind of cool

I know it is racy and if you are pious and afraid to say "vigina" then do not read the article. Fakin, Daily Mail..still I really like her because she is smart and if she wants to have sex, what do you care?
Slut shaming and carrying on about what is correct will only get you more mad and judgy!

I was standing next to one of my favorite co workers, a gorgeous, voluptuous  gal and up comes a man who we work with,  my age, married, with kids, 4 kids, he comes between us and says, "Oh, my favorite ladies :):):)"
I am like creepy, he put his hand on her and got real close and pretended to hug was creepy and I said something to her about it.
She knowingly looked at me and walked away.
Later I couldn't shed the creepy feeling so I told her that it is sexual harassment and she needs to know that.
"Oh. Anastasia, you don't know, he offers fancy dinners and all sorts of things to get me to go out with him."
"fakin dozy creeper!"

Friday, August 26, 2016

The Old Whore She Brings More

one at a time new moon excite new moon unite new moon make right Virgo Virgo clean and tight

That is how I do soap orders because I do not have a proper label machine or what ever.
Yes, I can order labels that stick because now there are all sorts of templates. Then what, am I supposed to be committed to a blend for like a year? See, it is me, not the labels! A year? Who has that much rose?? May hap me, someday!

Am I getting slower? A little. Still, my hands are where it's at!
I am getting slow in different ways than my parents.
Where my parents (The fukin greeks who I love) can't fathom working the internet, I can at least browse and what not..Me? Look, I am having a problem with the whole gender thing. I hope every one is happy but now that you are a boy and not a girl even tho you're born a girl or the other way when the "gay" means you get to be more silly, irresponsible and  get to be playful than others...I feel like we create who we are more than ever.

Personally, I am okay with people being what they want, "follow your dreams", I say...I hear my peers talking and it is very hard for therm.."these kids today!!"
Yes, they used to say that about us and our bell bottoms and halter tops and long hair, what a big deal that was! People were beaten hard for that hair. Fakin Puritans!

Oh and you know who invented the "scape goat"?
Everybody, that is who.
We love to add shame or blame on others. Somehow we feel better about all the awfulness about our selves and we carry one blaming, revenging and maybe even making gaps in friendships too big to fill again.
Don't burn all your bridges..yes, still tho, you do not have to walk on them exclusively..find other ways to satisfy your needs. Like being quiet and being happy inside, without your phone or the likes on your facebook.
Then again, it is very exciting when people like your stuff in the instagram, yea?

Yea, I only do an order one at a time. They are all so special to me. Each thing my hands touch should be for all the good not some silly drama that has us in hand cuffs begging for the next thing, when it was in our own hands all along.

The next new moon is a biggie!
I do think so.

Virgo Virgo wonder man
Virgo Virgo amazing woman...
these energies are the best
they put us to the test
we make it look easy
we bring class and a little bit cheesy
you're cheesy
now, clean up this mess

Thursday, August 25, 2016

quote of my day

All national institutions of churches, whether Jewish, Christian or Turkish, appear to me no other than human inventions, set up to terrify and enslave mankind, and monopolize power and profit.

 Thomas Paine

Tuesday, August 23, 2016

I am so excited! Fall skin treatments and more!

I bought a gallon of natural Mango Butter and another one called Sal and I am going to mix them with the shea butter and some natural raspberry seed oil along with cold pressed fresh avocado oil. It will be nice, the next butter blend, because it will not only make your skin feel amazing, it will also nurish and radiate healing all around and that kind of lovin' should smell great as well.

shea butter
mango butter
sal butter
raspberry seed oil
avocado seed oil

now then, what should we smell like? 35 fold vanilla that I just bought?
Okay, 35 fold vanilla, natural, advanced and tenacious with intense fruity vanilla flavor. Yes!
Should I make her more about Lilith and less about sweetness? I will babies, I will, I will add ylang ylang extra and maybe an orange blossom or two drops..

Now we wait, we wait for the delivery..deep breath, yea, life, is fine, so much the better and so much the safe and so much the indulgence that radiates with higher journeys through our time together..

crazy annie's quote of the day

"if your friend is nice to you but mean to the waiter, they are not a nice person"

Monday, August 22, 2016

Life Worth Living

strange brew look what is inside of you

two faced
don't be fake
I can see through your innuendos
I can see you are a freak
it is cool as long as you don't freak out on me

I am older and wiser and it will always be that way
I put in the time and always refresh
whilst you while away the days living the way you like
it is all good
I accept you

I walk away free from worry about you
I do my thang and do it with my best thoughts
I don't care about being humble or too proud
that feeling, those vibes, they come and go
ebb and flow
and still we get to wake up and start fresh and new
"hello" and, " How do you do?"

Sunday, August 21, 2016

I went to a garden party to my cousins house and more zombie tales from walking dead

dude! What a a nice regular suburb house and then in the back, awesome..closed off with tall cypress and has path ways and a fenced nice pool and a freaking perfect little house like a mini with everything including a fire place and by the wow!
Who does that? People with loads of money? I am sure that is a start but I think my cousin Johnny is a genius who really put out the effort to make what he made. He said he did it through time. I hadn't seen him since 2009 or something.

I felt like it was wonderful to be around someone who put in the time and made something great.
Yes it was the perfect patio and natural cypress fence but it was perfect. Like he had these fat grapes all over one of the bushes and I was like, "who grows grapes like this? The were so good! I wonder if they were GMO grapes? ha haha
( do they GMO garden grapes?)
Who are these, "they"?

ha ha ha
Anyhow I had a nice time with all The Greeks! We went we came home I watched was perfect!
Remember when Rick got pissed after he told Lori that he had to kill Shane and she pulled away? The whore!
She says she really loves you and then she thinks she gets to be mad..He told her how he really feels and if she cared for him she would have embraced him not flaunted her love for another man in  his fucking face. She is a little gross, Lori is! And what a sordid mess with getting pregnant with in weeks of your husbands death.

 This is why friends, we must put in the good time not the "good times" when it counts which is every day, you find your love and you take care of that by sharing by talking by not being mad about their ideas by really having sex till you cry and by having a real friend always with no guilt secrets.

Rick, though...
After the farm, he took over. Someone had to. he did not make the zombies happen, shooting Shane..yes, they turned around..sigh...
Remember how he just let it all out and they finally got it in their heads that they were not ever gong to be safe and he was a boss! I love him and I hope he finds his bossness in the next few episodes. He looked really scared in that last scene with Negan, but Rick will figure it out. He has been too relaxed and the night killing of Negan's men was not well thought out. This shows that he is not a saint..we should not want that from him. is he loyal? Is is protective? okay okay, his thing with Jesse was creepy, it was..fuk off if you're  married unfulfilled whore! You don't cut a mans hair like that!
ha ha

Saturday, August 20, 2016

we all come from the goddess

and to her we will return..oh yea,

Today, I added to the song :) my body, my meat suit will rot and I will become dust, what was one time my bones which carried me will be but dust..made up of smaller and smaller particulates, silica, calcium, magnesium, phos..yea oh the stars and the heavens..we are one and my mind is me, your inner mind is you and I hope that your thoughts are as thriving and fruitful..confidential and full of confidence..

I used to sing that all day when I thought I was in touch with my feminine side, my witch side, my power, my inner power.
One day someone who hated witches, asked me, "what is your inner power anyway?"
He spoke in such disdain and anger that I would classify my inner power by some other no white creed or non Jesus related rule book.
I answered that it was something inside that gave confidence and real comfort in ones own head space..inner power.
I remember saying that in such poise and calmatude. I was a runner and martial artist and could still kick ass and still enjoyed debate. I was so intrigued by the actual workings of things and the why and how of things and the lies just kept on in the outside world as they still do.

 Karma, free will what ever guilt thing we devise for our mistakes..I think those things are the makers and drainers of ones confidence juice. I call it juice because as soon as you freak out about something, you spew chemicals that makes it all loose ground..cortisol attacks and it all rushes in the gut, the stomach..which is where all reality happens and why you live.
Confidence is something so interesting to me because I can tell when I have it and also when I am weak or sad.

I still get nervous when I see many emails after I send soap to my customers.
I worry and fret because maybe it is not what they expected or not rosy enough or my other errors in the soap business. Can it ever really be rosy enough? I do not think so not any day!
I hope that they understand how lovely and amazing their products are because essential oils are the best thing ever for thinking stuff through. Anyone who uses frankincense oil is sure to consider life's wonderment in other areas of his life. It is magic in its magnificent reality, its recipe.

Inner power..why, why do we witches crave its renewing and cleansing effects?
I would say that is where "will" comes in. Not fuking "free will"

Nothing is free if it comes with an ultimatum. That is manipulation, not free will..

I  always wonder how a mind can lie to itself all day and then someone will say to me, "yea, but free, will, god gives you free will!"
"He does does he?"
Nothing is free if there is an ultimatum and friends and lovers, there is always a price to happiness.
Yes there is. Nothing comes without effort. And if you don't believe me, look at the ragged drunks in the streets sometime, in the city, and then ask why, why spend all day grieving and being angry and hating..those are prices you pay for the lack..
wait, I was on inner power and confidence!
It really does all fit together in my confident mind.

I will take this full moon to expose myself to me..
To hold myself to a higher calling of something which gives me personally, more confidence, more also an ability to reason in a calm and thoughtful way and resting, I will love the resting.

Thursday, August 18, 2016

neroli neroli neroli Full Moon Power neroli neroli neroli "oh mother goddess in my own mind, make me a neroli pie?

I am getting a very very little bit. the good stuff too. I know you can buy 5 different kinds neroli but my favorite one is 60 dollars for a quarter teaspoon expensive so we had better use it wisely!
I made soap and wanted to dump my whole thing of 1/4 teaspoon of my extra fine neroli from Eden in the last batch of soap, I was so crazy in the brain! For Neroli. Good thing I had been storing that nice petitgrain, I bought for just times when soap becomes art becomes cakes becomes witch craft!
I am goddess
Reflect my light..go, do it, show your face to the truth and be free from guilt and restraints/

Maybe being a actual witch is  with in your abilities, to be able to change or transform and rearrange if you will, anything you care to work with..craft is about work and practice. It is about finding balance and making it pretty in the eyes, the eyes, the mind, some place where a person can stop and say, "I like this, it is something worthy of my time."

I really love this photo :)

This last full moon for the last two weeks has had me gasping for a breather to just look in the mirror. I avoid scales and mirrors and it is funny, they are all around me all day. I look the one time and forget and in the wee hours of the morn, I may accidentally wear a shirt inside out from not wearing my spectacles, forget one of my kid's names or show my age when I do that..oye!
Saturn too.. so yea, when I start to want to see what "astrology" is doing because of the weirdness,
I see that there is Saturn moving forward again. it is so cool. I do hope you get to go outside and look at that giant rock in the heavens, our moon, la luna,  and know that without her we would stifle and rot! She pulls us to safety and comfort and  I loves her!

Take comfort
take stock
be real
don't mock me
It is all in fun
I  have nothing to prove
if you want to be yourself and be happy
then do it, go on
earn what you take
so easily  for granted
Saturn teaches this
if you believe in gods and mega spirits
or saints that protect
they can't
they can not go back
I say that's all you
inside your brain
the friends you make with your own thoughts and how you reason in your own mind
how you ask pertinent questions and how you is nice how you listen and observe
how you reckon with words that disturb your goddessness, your high opinion of yourself
 you see there is more
always more
and you attract what you already are
the friends you attract are what you are
the lovers you attract are what you are
don't change
be happy and all be it will be just right

neroli is what I want
I want an ounce
I want  also many other wonderful things but you know how you just can't sleep some nights because neroli made you all amazing in the brain and the ideas were plunging deeply and then rising thoroughly and sigh, I am a geek!

Tuesday, August 16, 2016

the lady from france

She was the first one I thought of when I woke up. That was weird so I know i would see her soon or i was just mentally wishing her well which I was, because she thinks I am special and she thinks she loves me. I do have these hands you see. They are all hurting. The people.

"Omg, I was just thinking of you all of a sudden this morning"
"me too, I saw myself at your house, your hands, woman, your hands!"
"are you okay?"
"yes, yes, I just need you to fix me"

Yesterday, I am selling stuff and thangs to Delvin a guy who just got married and the wife, already on the phone telling him to buy 2000 milligrams of b complex and insisting she got it at our, she did not.

complaix, I am complaix.. lol

anyhow we explained to him that the b's don't come that way, that some of them do not even make 1 milligram let alone 2000 for each one..dude, you'll die!

He was so happy he spent a lot of money on things for himself and then as he is leaving, he turns around and says, "anastasia, can you just touch me here and see what is up?"

Of course I buried my  strong hands in his trapesius and it was good..what? I can't say, "no"..

"you need your own practice.."
They tell me that..naw..fist off, they wouldn't come. people say they will come, but they do not. That is why naturalpaths are not rich..everyone is getting by while the man keeps making more money to get his face on the telly and brainwash us in to wanting things that he wants us to want  and then our neck hurts from having to hold our fat heads up  for so long with nothing more in them but fake dreams and wonder lust..and who is the best swimmer..I personally don't care who can swim the fastest unless he comes over here and builds me an oven and brings cash..ha ha ha ha, loads of  cash...

Clear that brain and think more on what is and has been real not fairy tales.

I love mythology, I know it reflects what we are but remember the dragons and beasts we fight in myths are really our horrid thoughts..jealousy, greed, petty annoyances, being so high on yourself that you are confused and act brave in the face of too simple challenges  and then the big ones leave you stunned to where you are back down to earth..of course you are..we all are.

I feel like a massage table is what I should have next tho.

Monday, August 15, 2016

Saturn goes direct and why I will say something metaphysical now **disclamer bad language

When Saturn goes direct you can expect many things like work related..the way it happened in 2016 is relevant because the whole year, the fiscal year, school year, after vacation year and then eclipse season starting?? Look, I feel it so I am talkin!
I am for talking and saying and asking..
remember how many people died in just the last 100 years for speaking their minds to the anglo perfect race who came and killed them for saying they did not want to fight for European's war on who gets the boundaries. The 18 year old boys were sent to fight in shit trenches while the politicians planned the theater only to get a mile of land they can call their own. People at home here, were saying no and paid dearly to say things I say every day here in this blog!
It stuns me the redaric (spell that because google does not know) and  brainwashing that goes on from them and what they say and do to other humans.

Saturn direct..I know!

It hurts  me that socialists were killed, castrated and hanged because they said things that shocked and told them everyone has a right to say no.
Oh yea, you think so do you!
How many were called communists for the same programs we easily take advantage of today, Medicaid, welfare, community service, think mr big hat is all good do you? He says words.
We pay for that and we must because despotism is real in humans. They need to worship and fight for something by enslaving lesser humans. Too bad all their choices are not even their own because they are part of a slave based collective called Capitalism which always gives the top five percent a third of the wealth while using the masses to do all the work..and I am being general here.
I say read more books and keep learning because that quietude and alone time you can spend being unique and rare and and not some dumb fuk masturbating to tits on your phone.
Saturn direct
is about reality check and pain.
It is about learning to give in at no choose choice or a child's choice of what it is  they should do to be really loved,  because you are a servant of the system or you are not. You are a beacon of light for the real words you should say or are you gonna live in some bubble where your god only loves your kind of good?
Saturn Direct..
Mix Saturn with an air sign
Say what you want out loud to your self not some camera
say to your mind what you really want
why you are really doing the things you do
which leave you weak and drained of all purpose
It is not that nice to be bored..don't
be always so super next thing that you are exhausted from sheer happiness and wonderful friends on your ship..which is driven by something more magnetic and pulls you always to reality
Saturn direct is about being devoted in care
what IS your best thing anyhow
do not tally your do's
it makes for instability says me and Saturn as I have been living with him all my life..Saturn on my ascendant has been like his rings of ice and dust propelling me in his stern way..he doesn't scare me..I am already in it
I can take it

fix things now
clean up room
stretch your bones
you walk high and freely in constant observation
not disapproval
not anger
not haste
 cool mode
 clean mode
 serene mode
knowing thangs baby
laughing about thangs
don't forget to fakin breathe and know you are not the bomb of life

there are many other things
there is gonna be more
there is always more

Sunday, August 14, 2016


that is me
My little grandson, he calls me that.
Listen, all I am going to say, is that I  am smitten and have changed :)
that is what your children's children do to you.
Maybe I love babies?
 Sweeties all and I love all of them. They come in the store, the young gals with the babes.
My boy came to the store. He walked the whole thing and you have to follow him. he knows orange and cat in Greek and yiayi, that is me. I bought him a puzzle and he was fine about leaving. He does'nt like to leave me. No one does. You know that. I wonder why. I am lazy you know. I will rather make him mud pies than teach him orange...he knows lavender and he knows tomato and he knows orange pumpkin because one thing about yia yi is that is she  shows up. She holds your hand if you want and she will say "no" if she must. He knows pumpkin but good.
I counted 8 so far out there growing. yea...yea...yea..
it is always  something you can grin about and then go about and do your thing

Even when I say "no", I am still with you...that is real love baby!

Saturday, August 13, 2016

Rain makes us quiet

wood carvers wanted

carve me a lavender stamp
make it so it says


not a stamp from some shop that everyone has
not a soap hunk that anyone has in a perfect box
with expensive writing

I want a stamp that is really gonna be me
do you suppose that could be
something very witch and earth and all that is really good
like it says
hey, you want this soap, it is for you
you want the French feel
the vibe
excellent delivery
you want that and you want it for all
anti inflamed
anti burn
anti itch
anti friz
anti fear?
okay yes, anti fear it is
because you see real fear is from punishment of bad thoughts
unworthy accusations to your dreams maybe
unkind evaluation of your kindness and compassion
does lavender make all your fears go away
I hope so
face what needs to change and you'll be gratified at not having to punish yourself

I am dreaming and conjuring at the moment before I make my luscious lavender hunks
I am molding and bringing in what needs to flourish and what needs to be done
I would really like fresh olives for the stones..I hear there are wild ones in Indiana
maybe it is worth taking a drive with my buckets. you want to go with?

Friday, August 12, 2016

the August, I wish I could langusih like this all weekend long

Hey man, when all ya 'll may be resting all weekend like I have been resting all week, you will see how nice it is. I work on the days that you don't have to and to me it is just as good.

That said, I wish I could stay home for a month or so and make good fuking soap for us all the days :) because I love that life of home and crafting! I am good at blending. I am good at making a good smelling soap which will not only enliven your current spectacular way of thinking, but the oils, the oils, you see, they will do what you need to have projected on the forefront of your thoughts.
all true!
I am "compleix"
Like to say this as a Wentworth character. lol
I can't watch that stuff because I can't. I am so done with TV I think for a tad. I love just one show at a time and nothing has been too worthy of my time.
Game of Thrones..meh..
Who cares about it. too slow, boring characters, and too much waiting for obviously wacked myths..
wait? The Walking very much like that but, but, we have Andrew Lincoln so I say, higher caliber of acting and stage presence and no wigs. Heath and Michone need to loose the wigs, Yuk. When Rick was kissing Michone, you know what I was thinking? I was wondering how that dreadlocks would smell after so long on the road, She did shampoo that morning so, we are good.
I need clean musky and warm, not dank musky and stinky. LOL

Meanwhile I have been trying to tie up my tomatoes because they got so big and fat that they all fell over. I made so many mistakes this year and still managed to make a nice fruitful garden. Next year, will be so much better and I know I always say that. lol


This week, I have been  planning  Lavender Soap.
It will reek lavender in every way because I will use twice as much as I am supposed to. It will be a little bit green like the fancy ones. Those actually have color in them, know that. I want the earthy green that contains the pulp of the whole olive pit. The Lavender will be a spiky dry one because I know it lasts longer in soap that the Bulgarian or Kashmere  variety of lavender oil.
I wish I could stamp a nice big  "LAVENDER" word, right on it, but I have tried to do this in the past and it looks janky. It does. So Unless I find a proper stamp that says, "lavender", I will not go with that idea..
It will look very french and have ground lavender flowers from the garden. Organic lavender flowers, mine.
Lets us now think on this for a moment..
I will add some drops of smashing oils to highlight our lavender..frankincense, myrrh, and a few drops of this and that. Yes, the lavender will surround you at every second of your washing, bathing, soaking, face cleaning, toe scrubbing..and all your pinker parts too.
I love you.
Have a good day.

Wednesday, August 10, 2016

good days and sunshine moments

I was thinking about how lovely we are and how we have it all.
I was thinking that sometimes we do not have it all. Like all the trinkets that might make us momentarily content until the next thing we may conjure up appears before our mind and then our grasp.

Take care of what you already have and be tired at bedtime is the best.
I hope you are well and happy as you read this.

I made salad with the veggies.
chop peppers
put salt
lemon juice
good olive oil
black beans if you have them and some cheese if you want to. I ate this whole bowl with Italian bread. mmmmmm

Monday, August 8, 2016


Hello and happy birthday sweet Leo folk.

We have so much learning ahead of us and one must remember that and stop carrying on about things that do not have anything to do with me and you.
Not even Hilary or Trump have anything to do with me and you.
I saw pictures of her on a news site that were like really mean. Why? They do it to Merkle in Germany too. I do not know anything about Hilary except that she inspires ire in people that is for sure.Still though. it is mean to constantly hate on her and maybe average people should wake up and actually be involved in daily government before they call anyone names, like "bitch". Most of them are overweight, smokers on blood pressure medicine and have diabetes but yea, Hilary is evil. ha ha maybe she is. She swims with sharks and we all know this fact, "you are who you run with"!
One side says the other side is violent and then goes and makes a ruckus on the other side! Always fighting for the man, the big man,  god, who can never be satisfied with anything he made. Fighting and carrying on about a politician as if he is one to be worshiped! Bad habit as it always gives off disappointment in the end as we all know there are no miracles without effort from someone living and not in the invisible. But then why do we worship celebrities and Trump? Or cry for the gorilla who was going to kill that little boy? They all lined up to kill the mother because she was not watching him enough? All the hate and yea it is sad, but only people without kids do not understand how so fast, a little one can get in to trouble!
I wonder if they were all barren? Because if not, we are talking about hypocrites who just want to hate for the sake of it. That give me pause about our human race..all of us, brown or white!
And, guess what, there will be a new president, you will go to sleep tonight, and kiss your kids and make breakfast and eat good food..many will not and do not even care of Hilary or Trump wins..wins wins..who will win? Some, they have not had soap for months or have not had shoes. No shoes means parasites in third world countries, but hey, they are not us, we are exalted by the gods to live in our best place ever and yet, the fighting over, apples and oranges..the difference between malic acid in apples to citric acid in oranges..yea..

Sunday, August 7, 2016

it is August and I always realize it later

The nights are wonderfully cooler, the days hot and dry
It is August and I am happy
happy that I have water and a yard that makes flowers
and by now, plenty of weeds. I will yank them out and make a nice haven
the hummingbirds, they come around at three
everyday they make their rounds
then come the yellow tiny finches, tiny waving back and forth on a tall zinnia
which by now is making fat heads that almost look like a penis lollipop
(not intended for humans)
they land and swing a bit as their beaks grab up all the sugar.

Saturday, August 6, 2016

touching earth ( a poem of no significance)

each morning I touch down
first my feet
I place them carefully on the carpet and rest for a moment
I will each muscle and each bone in my feet to take note of my demands
Higher consciousness, my atomic friend, I say, good day!

As I stand and I realize the weight of my body
the weight of my mind
I know right away in my heart or whatever it is
I carry it I nurture it
at that moment I begin to carry me through the day

I will be light
I will walk easily
my head reminded to pull up my aging form
I am a witch, powerful,  in  ways I never imagined
I am not superhuman and will parish
If death is the final end, I do not care
I am but a speck of dust on a speck of dust on a huge rock traveling really fast

I am willing to hold tight and enjoy this ride
I am willing to forgive and move past my doubts

I am not afraid of money
I am not afraid to speak a thought
I will success
I will it to come to me and you
I will your comfort and joy
I say this to myself as I make coffee
I wash my hands again and the scent of nutmeg and tangerine take me right back
to me

roasting banana skins now

So I bought the ingredients to make the black soap and maybe, maybe, I will begin the process of scenting a heavy duty amazing soap.
I said shea butter for sure but I am talking oils.

I have templin fir
I only have a little bit birch (not tar)
balsam fir
syrup made with those and then infused with the tobacco flowers I have been drying.
Maybe, we are gonna freak out, maybe it will be "just" soap
I have oakmoss
sage that awesome Greek one from Eden..mmmmmm
I have a little myrrh that kicks fucking ass!

"All this in a black soap?
"You have made a black soap before, it was a pastey mess."

It really was, Everybody loved it. I sold every sliver.

You know what is good about this second time? I have that vita mix and I am going to make powdered banana peel of the most powderest powder ever. More than a mortar and pestle, I say!

There are many black soaps out there, I know. Maybe each one is special because of what you add to it. Like, if all you have is coconut skins, you'll burn them to make charcoal because charcoal is good for everything. You can clean your teeth, hair, your face. Its ph or whatever is perfect and why black makes brighter? It has everything to do with atoms, that I know and we're burning up to burn them skins.

You know the ones I don't care for? The ones that say perfume or fragrance with essential oils and there is not a drop..only words. Why, why do they need to lie to the people who give them money?

Oh, the vetiver I  just bought, is so thick and buttery that I will put it in the batch for sure. I think I need more balsam fir too.

Friday, August 5, 2016


I am finally making more black soap
It will be composed of roasted green banana and shea butter
It will be as authentic I can get it and that means time

take the peel of bananas and roast them black (about six peels)
let them dry and then grind them up
add the green banana powder (it is available at wholefoods or amazon)
 make soap as usual
80% good olive oil and 20% organic coconut oil, shea butter, cocoa butter, jojoba, almond meal if you want to..coconut fibers from the skin..any black charcoal roasted thing you like.

20% water phase which I will use organic almond milk

essential oils are to be announced..
sometimes botanicals get in the way of the thing you want to smell. Then, a year goes by and you finally get the incense cedarwood you have been longing for as I did when I made ceps and cedar..
Time changes everything.
Black soap should smell good and fruity tho.
What do you think?

just another day

"yea, I am a strong woman! I make all this stuff for my kids and I will not take any shit!"
She was a strong woman, I would not mess with her.
"oh, nice to speak your mind with family."
"that is right, I tell my dad how it is and if that doesn't work, I have three knives on me right now!"
She gave me a look and I smiled. Feeling like, wow..okay.
"That is cool, I love knives!"
In the back of my mind, the alone me, where I can't say what I was thinking..
"dang glad I do not have to fight that chick..dude, I'd be dead.."
Three knives! What do you need a knife in the grocery store for? I have a couple of  knives in the car and one in my bag..just in case I need to cut a pear or a cheesecake.

my cheesy walking dead poem

those of who we've all heard who
want to be mad about our fine story
the end of the world story
the one where the dead indeed do rise like in the bible stories
Jesus was said to tell
or Paul
or Eusevius and the rest of the long robes who saved documents that do not matter
the end  where each breath may be the last
Rick never understanding how big things really were
went out looking for trouble this time
what led him to this tragedy was his ego
his pride
his unending strength to fight
his ability to know when he is down

Remember how he hides behind that mask of fear
There is a snake coiling deep inside him right now
Of course he is scared He knows what can be
Rick does
He is planning
He is well trained to take down that skinny ass Negan
Rick is the man to do it. To respectfully Unite like minded forces for the good of all
Not the lazy fucking ass Negan who doesn't want to grow a garden..ass
The whole earth is a garden and you will dig
we all have to dig
No one wants to fight anymore
they are tired
sick and hungry
and this guy wants that too
Rick will know what to do
In all his loss
he finds a way to defend his people
the ones left to talk and care for
when does it end
When Abraham dies
When Glen gets bashed

Dig deep Rick! You gotta dig deep!

I am going to die. No more kid stuff! is what I mean to convey. Not that I want you to die! I want you to be happy. It is hard to be happy.

I can't hardly wait for the zombies. That quote was from Rick and me if we were together and we would be because I would be Michonne all day. Yes, I would have a sword, I have many knives tho, I love them.
I would be like, "Rick, if not, I am still with you" She was with him from the first moment. that is what love does to you. It makes you loyal and honest with each other. She saw the man he was and even when he fell she was actually there for him. That is real love right there.  I feel like he was way over the top emotional with the husband of Jessie..what a waste!
I am like, "woah, how did she stand it when he was kissing that blond, he fell for the cliche' right quick didn't he?"  I didn't care for that and yet, Michone let him make mistakes and she was still with him and really, the sex has nothing to do with it.
That is TV and we are real life. Fun Though! I love the walking dead I love it love love love it. Nothing compares and not even Winona Rider in Stranger Things and The Upside Down..that was good though!!

Orlando Bloom naked with the big peen..woakala..yo..woakalllaaa..he is a creeper a little bit?? WTF! I guess he is proud of it. Am I being too square, is that sexy now? Maybe he thought they were alone?? In that case , no, they weren't and here is a thought, women have been naked for many many years so..if men want to be naked, then what is the big deal? You know what the big deal is.

**((Oh about that chick the other day who I was so mad at..(sheepish and sorry if I hurt your feelings about it, I am sure she does not read me I hope she doesn't or if she does, well, some people need  certain words that open their eyes. I am a messenger not a is a mistake sometimes to get too close) Being more with anyone is a sacrifice right?
I think one of the things that struck me is the mentality which carries over from me 100% of the time at work not really being able to speak my mind and catering and getting "close" with people I cater to becomes a platform in our comradeship, maybe? Shocking and still remains the outrage when one is not being served correctly in the friendship...
What do I know. I am boring and play with knives and then make soap and talk to you and then I clean up and go to work and i read another thing about why and what we may be..boring and sharp witted I will tell you! Yesterday, I listened to Richard Fineman lectures and wrapped orders. it was so beautiful to me!
I like Jasmine green  tea right now.)) in the afternoon and I love coffee in the morning. The gardens are fat man!

Thursday, August 4, 2016

Tai Weinman - "Mother of Dragons" (NPS 2014)

play it again ma'am

strange things and business

I have had three glorious days off until yesterday afternoon when a local gal got all like what do you mean, what do you mean and then she said what do you mean..
so I dealt with it like I deal with everyone who texts me too much with  questions. I did not answer the last one.
You know what my bestie does when I do not answer? She calls me back and I tell her why and she is like, "you never have to tell me why"
She does not send text after text after text..seriously, I have a web site so you can order, this whole 'how much do I owe you" I am not a street vendor trying to make deals! Bring cash to my house if you want products. I say this to everyone. Do not get mad if I run out of something I am supposed to hold for you. This is a business, order it on line. Do it. Break away from the bonds of the checkbook. Get yourself a prepaid card and some more freedom so you do not have to wait for me to make time. That is why I made the web site. there are good prices there. You do not have to order the old whore, oh wait, "nothing with patchouli", you that there puts me uneasy. It is like saying you hate onions or garlic or celery! WTF? That is the trio in all soup. You think your bottled water is gonna save you? I hope so..but no one is safe. You are gonna are. I am going to die. No more kid stuff! is what I mean to convey. Not that I want  you to die! I want you to be happy. It is hard to be happy.
It is aromatherapy, you value it, you want it, you study it, you care about its constituents..they are like mini saints all over the place actually protecting you.
My friends, my mom, they know, when I say, "oh mom, the power went out and I am not home"
"no worries" "are you okay?" They do not say, "what do you mean?"

Yea..I can't be mad, I can't! Everything is so good, just so wonderful in my life. I love it!
My loved ones, my friends, the real ones, the ones I can talk to..and be me..the busy, tired me..
My bestie..she is fakin cool..
Yea she is, my heart and my mind flourish when she is near and we don't even live close. I know I can be myself, which is busy bitches, faking busy and tired and I am not always able to answer texts or conversations about my schedule and times.."oye!!"

You see, for some reason, I attract people who are a little bit broken. A little bit. It is the business in which I work. Health Supplements and their uses. The people that get close to me are the ones that come  to the vitamin apothecary in the first place I know this. I extend myself as far as I can when they are hurting and have issues with cancer. It is heavy sometimes. They want to get close to the vibrant healthy light that you are. I get that.
Yogananda used to say that there are spirits lurking from past lives all over the place, that is what ghosts are..He also said that ghosts and bad thoughts are what "that all" is! Thoughts do travel hard and long. We make that happen. Look at how long we take something at face value and nurture it and belong to it and it helps us and hates everything bad against us..not just the bad, okay, but everything bad against us..that there little idea is what creates tribes and weapons to protect our women and our children. They fought then too and we will fight now as hard as we can..
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Where am I going with this?
Yes, I tried to wake up mad about the world. I am!

"Jesus and Himmel woman and Shiva and fakin the one who is supposed to be still on the mountain blessing all the Indian people in to higher consciousness..
someone was stabbed yesterday, someone was blown up, someone's baby died because your god's thugs killed all the babies in the night, someone's heart was broken yet again and you cry because Anastasia, is too busy to make time for you?"

Monday, August 1, 2016

so sweet how families must change

I was talking with an American Armenian gal who I love because she is real and has good intentions..for the most part..I mean no one is a saint, remember that, even the saints are not saints.
Saint Paul may ass!

We were watching a beautiful and I mean gorgeous gal walking around with her mom and dad close behind and there was a boy, pandering, trying to say things the old guy would if this daughter was a prize they were letting go and he must be interviewed well. lol
He was cute too and I thought, "he must really care for her to go to such lengths to ask permission or somehow be good enough for their prized daughter."
As I was thinking this, my friend spoke..
"our people do that, he is not Armenian either, we would not accept him"

See? I have grown a lot from even last year where I would have hurt her feelings at such a dumb thing, but no, I was poised and said this..

"In science, there are no races, just homo sapiens"

She looked at me and I could see her mind racing, "yea but my people, we stay pure.."

Not for long because you cannot!
I did not tell her that. Let her play with her toy ideas as long as she wants to, it will not matter. One out of four of her American educated children will marry outside their people because educated women do not want to be owned. Are those marriages better or last longer than most average marriages in the USA? Maybe they do. All I see are the same sort of dramas from all of us and smart girls want to choose on their own and not talk to their dad as if he is giving her away. What a load of crap!
My dad would beat me so bad so I would listen..he is old now and does not matter in my daily work or life's choices. He is happy to show up and say, "hello".  We have changed, I have changed and my daughters are free and respected more by me for that! See, everything will change. Women who wear the veil now, will have children and they will not want to wear it. They are done with this idea. Every one is or will be!
She will not want to be considered a prize of some sort where the family has her until she marries and is safely tucked away in a nice house with a nice bed and nice shoes and nice vacation visiting family of is nice to think so.

That girl? The one with the family shopping and pretending to peruse through our store? That one will be fine or no. I think she will be okay. Her mamma will be around to help her and her daddy will sit and watch the telly while grandchildren play in front of him..and, and, she will have the finest jeans to show off her   fine ass and nice shoes too..
That does sound nice. can't we just do that anyhow? Of course we can!